‘But you’re not alone,’ I have reminded him often.
His response is a kiss before he cuddles closer to me and withdraws into whatever is on his mind.
I’ve heard him crying in the bathroom every now and then, but I didn’t want to push. I’m afraid that I’ll push him too far. So, I stay silent most of the time and let him deal with whatever he’s going through. I just try to be there and be open if he ever chooses to share what’s bothering him. I just want him to know that he doesn’t have to ever go through anything alone. I’ll always be here, no matter what.
This morning, we were both on edge. My parents will be at the Christmas Ball tonight.
I heard him getting sick this morning. I guess he’s nervous about seeing them again. My mate is high-strung, and I suppose his nerves get the best of him sometimes, just as mine do me. I wanted to throw the door open and hold him in my arms until he was done. I could have rubbed his back and whispered that it would be alright.
The fact that I wanted to do that was… Well, let’s just say I held a friend’s hair back while she puked my freshman year after a bad gold schlager night, and I never did it again. But with Thomas, I wanted to be there for everything. I wanted to take care of him. I washisAlpha. I would do anything for him.
“Do you know how to tie a tie?” Thomas walked into the bedroom with his bow tie dangling from his hand. “Wow.” He stopped in his tracks and looked at me in my tuxedo. “You look… Wow.”
The awe-stricken look on his face made me grin. I walked over to him and pulled the hanging tie from his fingers. “I can’t believe you need help with this. But I’m glad you do.”
He chuckled as he looked up into my eyes. “I couldn’t get it to… I was frustrated.” He snarled. “It wouldn’t tie right.” He rocked on his toes.
“Stand still.” I looked down at him and placed my hands on his shoulders to keep him in place. He was fidgety as fuck.
“You really… uh… fill out that tux. How is someone born with shoulders that big? Was it hard on your mother when you broke her body coming out?” He frowned. “I bet our kids will be like you. Kids usually take after the Alpha, don’t they? I’ll have to get a hip replacement.” He sighed heavily.
“Do they?” I grinned. “I don’t know. I think I look more like my mom than my dad. But no one in my family really looks like me. They’re all thin. I got all the… brawn, I guess.”
“I like your brawn.”
I took a step back and stared at my handiwork.
“Did you get it? God… The last few days, these ties have felt like a fucking noose. This one even more so.” He pulled at it, and I growled.
“It’s perfect, just like you, Thomas. You look so fucking handsome… It’s really gonna be hard not ripping you out of that suit all night long.” I held out my arms, and he came and nuzzled up against my chest.
“You’ll manage. This took work.” He huffed and blushed – it was fucking adorable.
“We don’t have to stay very long, do we? We could make an appearance and have a glass of wine or two with my parents and your friends. Maybe chat with mine if any of them show up. They probably won’t. This is my first time ever going, you know. My parents never miss it, though.” I was excited to show up with Thomas on my arm. I would have the most handsome date there.
“When are you going home for break?” He patted my chest, and I let go of him reluctantly.
“I think Iamhome. I mean, if you want to go to my parent’s house, then I’ll go with you.” I grinned and straightened my jacket.
“Are you trying to make me feel bad so I go home with you?” He cocked his head to the side like a fucking Jack Russell puppy.
“You’remy home now. Wherever you are is where I will be. I’m not missing our first Christmas together.” I frowned. I took a moment before I continued. Weighing if it was the right time or not. “You’ve been on edge for the last couple of weeks.”
“Longer.” He shrugged.
“Do you want to talk about it? Finally?”
“No. It’s just… end of year stuff. I always get a little… busy, I guess.” He turned and went to grab his jacket from where it hung on the handle of the dresser.
“Ok. I mean, finals for me were crazy, too. I’m just glad I had you here while I was studying.”
“I’m just glad you did well in your end of semester voice final. I think everyone was quite surprised to hear how nice your voice has become.” He slid his jacket through one of his arms, and I stepped over and helped him the rest of the way.
“Stop it.” I blushed. I was really proud that I got through that. I was way too nervous singing in front of the entire voice faculty, with my mate in the front row ready to judge me. I knew he wouldn’t take it easy on me. “Are you ready?”
“As I’ll ever be. Just don’t ever bake cookies again, honey. I’ll do that for you next year. I promise.”
“What? You don’t like burned cookies.” I chuckled.
