“Good, I expected nothing less. He needs to wake up soon—I have some serious questions about his career choice.”
I laugh and she smirks at me. I have no doubt that was her goal.
“I brought some cookies—come to the nurses’ station and help yourself,” she says before ducking out of the room to check her other patients.
I’ve been doing better since my phone call with Dad. I still cry and worry, but overall, I’ve been able to focus on Knox and be here for him without having panic attacks or leaving the hospital.
The doctor comes in and lets me know the swelling has gone down enough that they will begin to wean him off the medication. Now the decision to wake up will be on Knox. Ideally, he wakes up within the next twenty-four hours.
I stay with him as late as I can, but the nurses can’t let me stay another night. So, after Trey rode in the short round, he brought the camper to the hospital, and we all slept until I could go back to the ICU in the morning.
“Any change?” I ask as I stand at the nurses’ station sipping my coffee. I set the tray of coffee Jessie sent in for them on the counter.
“Hey, Kacey. No change so far,” Knox’s other nurse, Lindsey, replies. “But now that he’s basically off the medication, he might be able to hear you. Talking to them normally helps,” she says, giving me a small smile.
“Okay, thanks. His mom should be here this afternoon, too.”
I step into his room and slide the chair up to sit next to him. His color looks better today and someone combed his hair. There is also a bag of cookies on the side table. Melissa, no doubt. These nurses are underpaid angels on earth.
I tell him about Trey getting second last night, even playing the video so he can listen. How they’re both officially qualified for the national finals in December now, and that he finished the regular season number one in the world. The internet is filled with supportive and encouraging posts from fans wishing him well. His sponsors have reached out to Trey, asking if there is anything they can do. One even offered to fly his family here.
It’s touching to see how many people truly care about him. Including my dad, who has been worried sick about us both and is now using spoiling my dog rotten as a coping mechanism.
The doctor comes and goes on his morning rounds. He emphasizes how important it is that he wakes up soon. The sooner he wakes, the less likely brain damage is.
His mom will arrive in two hours, and while I want her here, I can’t stand the thought of leaving Knox. And only one of us can sit with him in the ICU. I know it should be her, and I won’t fight her for it, but there are moments where holding his warm hand, feeling the callouses scrape my skin, is the only thing keepingmebreathing.
I’m having one of those moments, holding his hand and reminiscing on this spring, how much he changed my entire world the day he showed up at the ranch. The machines beep their steady rhythm, as the nurses bustle past the glass door, and I finally break down.
“You promised me.You promised menothing in the world could stop you from being with me. So you have to wake up, you have to come home. Mountain Time, remember? We have plans. We have dreams. Please wake up, Knox. I love you.” My voice cracks and tears fall, but I keep going. “You told me you can’t lose me; well I can’t lose you either. You are the air I breathe, and I can’t do this without you. In fact, I refuse. Sowake up, because I love you,” I beg. The confession seems to break apart the silent room.
I rest my head on the edge of the bed, still holding his hand, shoulders shaking as I let the tears soak into the bedsheet. I don’t know how much time has passed when I feel his hand shift in mine. I jerk my head up so fast I see stars for a second. His eyes aren’t open, but his hand moves again.
“Knox—” I choke.
His eyelids flutter, and then I see them, his bright blue eyes. I’m sobbing again, holding his hand tighter. His eyes flare.
Shit, the tube in this throat.
“Hold on, I’ll get the nurse. Don’t close your eyes,” I plead as I press the button for the nurse. “They’ll come get it out.”
A nurse hustles into the room and calls for the doctor. “Hi, Knox. My name is Lindsey and we’re going to get this tube out of your throat soon. Just stay calm and try not to move.” Knox seems to ignore her, squeezing my hand and keeping his eyes on me, never closing them. Just like I asked.
As soon as they remove the breathing tube, Knox’s first word is “Sweetheart.” His voice is raspy from disuse and the tubes, but I’ve never loved hearing that word on his lips so much.
Chapter 45
Knox
Kacey’s crying. And I can tell I’m in a hospital.
What the fuck happened?
Why is Kacey here?
Wait, where is here?
A doctor and a nurse hover close by. I think someone asked me a question, but I can’t stop staring at Kacey.
