“Yeah, I just…I’m waiting to hear from someone. But they’re not texting me back.”
“Is everything okay?”
“Mhm,” she said. But I could tell that it wasn’t. “We should really get into the stadium. The boys are counting on you, Coach.”
“And you.”
She smiled up at me. “I am a pretty kickass assistant coach, aren’t I?”
“The best in the business. I actually have something for you.”
“We’re going to be late,” she said.
I opened the trunk and pulled out an Empire High jersey with my old number on it. “I thought you might want to wear it.”
She didn’t take it. She just stared at the fabric. “You want me to wear your number?”
I thought she’d be excited. But by the look on her face, I’d played this all wrong. “Sorry, it was dumb. We’re not in high school anymore. I think I was feeling weirdly nostalgic abouthomecoming…” my voice trailed off. I could hear Tanner’s voice in the back of my head:“Can you really imagine marrying her when your heart still belongs to someone else?”
I looked over at the school. Homecoming reminded me of Brooklyn, not Kennedy. What the hell was I doing? This was a really fucking dumb idea. I didn’t know what I’d been thinking. And clearly she was thinking the same thing. That this was crossing some kind of line. My heart started racing. Would I always be tiptoeing around my past? Would I ever be able to make this feel right to Kennedy? Because it all felt right to me.
I cleared my throat. “Forget it. I really like the shirt you already have on.” She was wearing a long-sleeved t-shirt that looked like it was from her days at Empire High. It was way more her. And I liked her exactly the way she was. I went to toss the jersey back in the trunk, but she grabbed my arm.
“No, I want it.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah, I was just surprised.”
“Why would it surprise you that I wanted you to wear my number?”
“Because it’s…” her voice trailed off. “It seems very official.”
“Not as official as proposing to you…which I would have already done if you hadn’t told me not to yet.”
“I know, I just…” she pressed her lips together instead of saying anything else.
“Kennedy, seriously, what’s going on?”
“I want it. I really want it.”
“Okay.” I handed her the jersey and she pulled it on. She couldn’t even try to hide her smile now. She looked back up at me. “I need to tell you something. After the game.”
“Or you could just tell me now.”
She shook her head. “After.”
“Or now.”
She laughed. “I know I’ve been acting weird this past week. And I…I need to tell you something. Because I really like you. But I’m not supposed to tell you. I’ve been put in an impossible situation and I keep waiting. And I…I just need to tell you. After the game.”
“Seriously? Just tell me now.”
“After.”
“You’re going to be the death of me,” I said and put my arm around her shoulders.
She melted into my side. It didn’t matter what she told me. As long as it wasn’t about her being in love with Felix, we’d be good.
