“I don’t know what will happen next, Deck. Not with Johnny, or the Center. Or with us. But you’re right. Bastardo can figure it out on his own for a day. I’m grateful to have you by my side.”
“I’m here.”
Chapter thirty-one
Cori
When the nurse came in to let us know Johnny was awake and talking, Deck and I still had no concrete resolution. All I knew was that we loved each other, and I wanted to be with him, but the idea of it also completely overwhelmed me. I envied sixteen-year-old me, who loved Deck with her whole heart and had no reservations. Twenty-nine-year-old me was too afraid of showing my belly or doing things wrong.
The nurse offered to walk us to Johnny’s room, but then her tablet beeped.
“Shoot,” she said, swiping at it. “I need to head in the opposite direction. Do you think you can find your brother’s room on your own? It’s at the end of the hall and around the corner.”
“No problem,” I replied.
I held Deck’s arm as we made our way. Outside, the early morning light was dim, but inside, with the bright fluorescents, time had no meaning. I whispered in Deck’s ear, “I don’t want totell my brother, or anyone, that we’re together yet. That feels like extra pressure we don’t need.”
“I think everyone we know will be happy for us. But if that’s what you want, that’s what I’ll do.” He leaned over and kissed me on the head. “I’m just happy to hear you say we’re together,mi preciosa.”
I laughed. “We’re together, but I have no idea what that means, and I don’t want anyone to know. Also, I reserve the right to wake up tomorrow morning and say something different and overthink and have new hang-ups.”
He grinned back. “Fair enough. Now let’s go take care of our brother.”
We rounded the corner and heard the heavy sound of boots hitting the linoleum. Another man headed our way from the end of the corridor. He wasn’t wearing medical scrubs, so I assumed he was a visitor like us.
The man came closer, and Deck’s arm grew stiff in my grasp. I peered sideways, startled to see a fierce, thousand-yard stare on Deck’s face. A moment ago, he’d been smiling. Now, he was clenching his jaw, nostrils flared. He looked hard. Unyielding.
As the man passed, I saw that he was young, perhaps in his mid-twenties, dressed in a white T-shirt and baggy jeans, with a black baseball cap. He narrowed his gaze on Deck, and Deck met his eyes directly, keeping his posture stiff. The man’s features eased slightly before he gave Deck the barest of upnods. “’Sup,” he said gruffly, walking on without an answer.
Once the man turned down the corner and was out of earshot, Deck relaxed. The intensity in the air took a few more beats to dissolve.
“Who was that?” I asked in a hushed voice.
“Alejandro.”
“The guy who gave Jayden the gun?”
Deck dipped his chin. “That’s the one.”
“He knows you?”
“Probably just from around the neighborhood. I only know his face because Emilio pointed him out once. Benefit of having a cop brother, I guess, but I’ve heard his name plenty.”
We were almost at the door to Johnny’s room. I stopped Deck, pulling him to the side of the hallway. “Why did he look at you like that?” I asked. “Like he had a problem with you or something?”
Deck rubbed the back of his neck. “No sé. Doesn’t matter how many businesses I start or years I stay away from the game. I’m always gonna be the guy who went to prison for almost killing Chi-chi. It gives me cred but also invitesinterest.” Deck moved to pull me into his arms. “It’s fine, Cori. You’ve been away from all this for a while, but you remember how it works. He’s just a dog trying to make sure I don’t want to piss on his tree.”
The prison stint would follow Deck for the rest of his life. I admired how he didn’t feel the need tofixhis narrative or hide it like I had.
“Well, I liked that scary-looking mafia boss face you made at him,” I teased. “Very sexy.”
He choked on a laugh. “Let’s go see Johnny.”
We walked into my brother’s room, and I felt optimistic. Somehow, Deck’s exchange with Alejandro had grounded me. We could all do hard things, including Johnny. I probably had no business feeling that way, considering the beeping machines hooked up to my brother. Not to mention how ragged and pale he appeared. But even with looking wrecked and all the wires amidst the antiseptic-smelling hospital air, Johnny reminded us immediately that he was still himself.
“If it isn’t the happy couple,” he whispered, mischief lacing his words. “I’m assuming you’re here to discuss the blissful joys of married life.”
“Cut the shit,” Deck said, fighting a smile and taking a seat on a rolling chair next to Johnny’s head. “You really scared us.”
