I can’t afford to let myself fall for him, but when he offers something like that, without abutor anif, I can picture a world where, like a total idiot, I throw away my dignity and let myself fall. Just a little bit.
He isn’t even interested, I tell myself.Don’t set yourself up for heartbreak like that.
I swallow thickly, clasping my hands together in my lap. “If you have time, I’d appreciate that.”
“We’ll find time.” He smiles, making my stomach flip like I’m at the top of a roller coaster, waiting for the descent into oblivion.
I mutter a quiet thanks, unable to meet his gaze.
As the car pulls to a stop in front of the house, I can’t help but wonder if Andrei’s comfortable here. He’s taken up residence in one of the guest rooms, just as he promised, but there has to be something I can do to make it feel more like a home for him.
Maybe I should clear out a room for him to use as an office, something so he doesn’t have to feel cramped in one spot.
As Andrei dismisses Mila, thanking her again for coming over at the last minute, I slip into Niko’s room and check on him. He’s tucked into his bed, safe and sound. His breaths come out in easy, sleepy puffs.
I expect to feel a momentary flicker of guilt over leaving him, but if it’s there, it has no teeth in place of the gratitude I feel for what Andrei did at the club.
He defended me. Even though it might have consequences for him later, he didn’t hesitate. He just put himself between Pavel and I, like it wasn’t even a choice. Like it was an instinct.
I can’t remember the last time anyone did something like that for me. I swallow the lump in my throat.
God, I hope Andrei doesn’t get in trouble for it.
When I step into the hall, I’m only mildly surprised to see him leaning against the wall across from me. I close the door behind me and move to step around him, even less surprised when he follows me toward my room.
“I’m sorry that I let Pavel get close to you,” he says, voice husky, hands shoved deep into his pockets. He looks contrite,his face absent of the scowl I thought was a permanent fixture. He’s always been such a stalwart figure, never betraying what he’s really feeling, that the sight catches me off guard.
“It’s my fault. I was the one who wandered off, remember?”
Andrei wraps his arms around me suddenly, pulling me against him, so close that I can hear his heart beating in his chest. I relax against his hold, trying to keep the rapid racing of my own heart under control.
“None of this is your fault.” He presses his lips against the top of my head. “Don’t be so hard on yourself.”
I hide my smile in his chest.
“You know, I really did have a good time tonight.”
He laughs lightly, sliding his hands down until they rest on my hips. “For some reason, I’m not sure I believe you.”
“You don’t have to believe me for it to be true,” I chuckle. “It went better than I thought it would.” The fuzzy feeling in my chest is making me dizzy, but the firmness of his hands keeps me grounded. I pull back and look at him, mesmerized by the different shades of silver and gray in his eyes glinting in the low light. “And thank you. For standing up for me.”
His face relaxes, a smile playing at the corners of his mouth. It’s a sight so intoxicating I couldn’t look away even if I wanted to. “Anytime.”
His grip is loose enough that I could pull away from him if I wanted to, but I don’t. I don’t want to be any further from him than I am.
His warm breaths intermingle with mine, making me realize just how quiet it is, how dimly lit the hallway is. My skin feelslike it’s buzzing. Before I can second-guess myself, I stand my toes and press my lips against his, my blood rushing in my ears.
His grip tightens, holding me even closer against him as his lips move against mine, his tongue gently prodding against my mouth, testing without being tentative. I lean into him, letting him take my weight.
The way he holds me against him, tight enough that I know I wouldn’t be able to pull away even if I tried, has the heat between my thighs rising faster than I know what to do with. When I shift, I can’t miss the outline of his growing erection as he pulls me closer, not an inch of space between us.
Oh.
He pulls back just far enough to ask, “Can we go to your bedroom?”
I nod in a daze, his nose brushing against my cheek and setting off sparks under my skin. I pull away with great reluctance, taking his hands in mine as I lead him down the hall.
The heat in the way he looks at me makes me feel like I’m standing on the edge ofsomething.
