He’d barely slept at all that night, and when he went to breakfast, he found Colin had beaten him there. His brother was sipping coffee and skimming the pages of a novel, but he set the book down when he saw Edward.
“You’re up early,” Colin commented. “I wasn’t expecting to see you for at least another hour.” He was the early riser of the pair of them—it was unusual for Edward to be up with the sun like this.
“I couldn’t sleep,” Edward explained. “I’ve had a lot on my mind.”
“Well, that doesn’t surprise me,” Colin said.
“I think I need to go back to London.”
“You mean, now? Today?”
“Right now,” Edward said. “I think I’m going to have a horse prepared so that I can set off at once.”
“Wait a moment.” Colin frowned. “You’re not even going to take the carriage?”
“The carriage will be too slow. I want to get back as quickly as I possibly can,” Edward explained. “I think riding is the only way I’ll be satisfied.”
“What about all your things?”
“I’ll have to ask you to bring them back for me. You’ll still come back by carriage, won’t you? And I’ll leave the footmen behind, of course, so they can help you. You’ll be all right.”
“Edward, I don’t know if this is a good idea,” Colin said. “Riding all the way back to London on your own is a massive undertaking. You should wait, and we’ll pack up the carriage and go together.”
“I can’t wait,” Edward argued. “I know it would be a little safer, but it will be much faster if I just go on my own, and I don’t want to delay. I want to get to her as quickly as I can. I feel as if I can’t breathe, and I won’t be able to until I see her face again. I won’t be able to relax until I get some kind of resolution here.”
Colin shook his head. “I’ve never seen you like this,” he said. “What’s gotten into you?”
“It’s what you said,” Edward replied. “I’m in love with her. It’s all I can think about. And I believe you that I’ll still be the kind of man who’s able to focus on business, but I can’t do that until I have this matter settled. I can’t think about anything but Lydia and what she might be thinking aboutme.”
“I’m afraid my words might have had too powerful an impact on you!” Colin said. “I did mean for you to go back to Lydia and settle things, but I never thought you would go right away. You have a meeting today, don’t you?”
“Yes, but I won’t be able to think about what I’m doing under these conditions,” Edward explained. “Colin, I’m going to need you to go to that meeting for me.”
“Wait—what? You’ve never asked me to do anything like that before.”
“I know I haven’t. And I know it’s not the kind of thing you’re prepared to deal with. I’m very sorry. I wish I didn’t have to ask it of you—”
“Well, I’m more than willing to help,” Colin assured. “Anything I can do, I’m happy to offer. I’m just surprised that you would trust me with such a thing. It never seemed like you would be willing to allow anyone but yourself to take care of business like this. I always assumed you would want me to stay far away from it.”
“I’m not Father,” Edward said. “Isn’t that what you told me?”
“That’s what I told you.”
“Father might have believed only one of us was capable of handling these sorts of things, but I know that’s wrong,” Edward said. “If I’m capable of love, you are capable of conducting a business deal. All you’ve got to do is take my books with you—I know you know how to interpret the numbers inside. You’ll be able to discuss the finances with the gentleman you’re meeting today. Please apologize for my absence—you can represent yourself as my business partner.”
“But I’m not your business partner,” Colin argued.
“Perhaps you should be.”
“You’ve never shown any interest in having a partner before.”
“I’ve never believed I needed one. But if there’s one thing this trip has taught me, it’s that you know a great deal more than I do about some matters, Colin. I would value your help in all aspects of my life. Will you consider being my partner? You don’t have to decide today.”
“I’ll consider it,” Colin agreed. “And for today, I’m more than happy to help you. Just promise me that you’ll get home safely. I don’t love the idea of you alone on the roads all the way back to London.”
“I’ll be all right,” Edward said. “I mean to travel quickly. I feel as if I have to be by her side as soon as I possibly can. It’s almost as if I can feel her calling to me across the distance. I’m sure I’m just imagining that, and yet it feels impossible to ignore—is this what love feels like?”
“It may be,” Colin considered. “I’ve never thought about it in quite those terms, but there is a part of me that longs to be at home with Nancy whenever I’m away. I do look forward to the moment I’m back in her arms. Perhaps that’s what you’re feeling right now.”
