I don’t know what to say, especially knowing I’m the reason she’s so upset. Sure, I don’t know for sure that he broke it off with her because of me, but the timing is a little suspicious. He dumped her, then came right home to climb into my bed.
And I let him.
“I just don’t understand,” she murmurs. “We’ve never even really been in a fight. Where did this come from?”
“Finn doesn’t strike me as the type to fight,” I say dumbly. “I don’t think a couple necessarily needs to fight in order for it to not work.”
“But it was working!”
“Was it?” The question spills out of my mouth before I have a chance to stop it.
My sister rears back, her face screwing up. “What is that supposed to mean?”
Jesus.Sweat beads along my hairline. This conversation is so incredibly uncomfortable. “It doesn’t mean anything, Vi,” I murmur with a shrug. “What can I do?”
Looking over at me with wide, sad eyes, I already know I’m not going to like what she’s going to suggest. She’s giving me the same kicked puppy look she used to give our parents whenever she wanted something from them that she knew they wouldn’t be okay with.
“Could you, maybe, talk to him for me?”
Oh, for fuck’s sake. This can’t be real life. “I’m not doing that,” I tell her.
“Please, Ash! You two seem to have formed somewhat of a friendly relationship.”
“He’s my boss, Vi. I love you, and I’m sorry that you’re upset and taken aback by this, but I’m not confronting my boss about why he broke up with my twin sister. That’s weird and completely unprofessional.”
It’s not lost on me that every single thing we did last night—and this morning—was significantly more unprofessional. I’m basically a walking hypocrite, but I’m not doing what she’s suggesting.
Violet rolls her eyes with a deep groan. “He’s such an asshole! How stupid of me to believe somebody like Finn Moore would be into me.”
“Vi, don’t be like that.” My chest tightens hearing her talk about herself in that way. “Just because the relationship didn’t work out, doesn’t mean he wasn’t ever into you.” The words taste bitter on my tongue. “I think Finn’s been on his own for so long, it’s probably hard for him to open up to somebody like that again.”
“Again?” Her brows pinch. “What do you mean?”
“You know, his ex-wife.”
“He never told me anything about her,” she says, shaking her head as she looks down at her lap. “I would ask, but he wouldn’t give me anything.”
I’m crawling out of my skin. I’d rather have a root canal performed on me without a lick of anesthesia than sit here and console my sister about her breakup with the man I selfishly helped her lose. And the sick part of my mind is clinging to the fact that he wouldn’t open up to her, but when I asked, he opened up seemingly easily. It’s twisted how that makes my heart thump harder.
Finn opened up to me when he doesn’t open up to many people.Why?
That’s not what I should be focusing on, though. My sister is clearly upset, and all I can think about is myself. Could I be any more selfish? Violet went out of her way to get me this job when I was stressed about being laid off, when she didn’t have to do that. She did it out of the kindness of her own heart, and how do I repay her? By hooking up with her boyfriend.
And what’s worse is Violet was nowhere in my mind while this was happening. Not once did the betrayal I was about to commit cross my mind. Never did I stop and think if doing that with him would be a good idea. I was so focused on Finn, and the way it felt having his attention, that nothing or no one else mattered.
I need to tell her.
I can’t keep this from her.
She’s my sister. Mytwinsister. We’ve never kept secrets from each other, at least not big, ugly ones like this. Sure, I’ve kept my decade-long resentment toward her to myself all these years, but that’s different.
Biting down on my molars, it’s right there on the tip of my tongue to spill my guts, but something holds me back.Something screaming at me, telling me she’s hurt enough. Relieving my guilty conscience won’t do anything to make her feel better. It’ll only make me feel better, and that’s almost as selfish as what I’ve already done.
Violet doesn’t deserve that.
So, instead I say nothing at all.
By the time I leave, I know what happened in the last twenty-four hours can never happen again. I don’t care how good it felt, or how much I’ve started to care for Finn. My sister and my job are more important than some hookup that probably wouldn’t even last. It’s not like Finn and I are destined to be together. It was one—okay, three—moments of weaknesses that can never happen again. It’s as simple as that.
