So now I finally understood what Mum had meant when she said Flynn was my magnet. Alice had said that people had interfered in her relationship with Xander but they’d been magnets and had pulled back towards each other eventually. Seeing them so happy together now, it was hard to believe they’d spent several decades apart. Could that second chance happen with Flynn and me? Was it really as simple as Dad believed – that love could conquer everything if you wanted it to? I hoped so because that was the final leap I wanted to take.
42
‘Any news from Flynn?’ I asked Rosie when I saw her in the kitchen the following morning.
Rosie checked her phone. ‘Not yet, although it’s a bank holiday so he might not come back to me till tomorrow. I’ll let you know as soon as he does. And I hope you’re not spending today working.’
I grimaced. That’s exactly what I’d planned on doing.
She shook her head at me, smiling. ‘You’re a hopeless case. How about a compromise? Why don’t I help you retrieve some of those boxes of photos and papers from the cellar and you can spend the day in the library going through them?’
‘That would be amazing. Oliver doesn’t mind?’
‘He doesn’t have the time to do it himself but he’s interested in what’s in there. He’s got no problem with you going through it and pulling it into some semblance of order if you’d like that.’
‘I wouldlovethat. You’ve just made my day.’
After carefully propping the cellar door open, we retrieved the first four boxes, figuring that would be more than enough to keep me out of mischief for the day. I hadn’t got very far into box one when Rosie appeared.
‘Email from Flynn. He’s sending a team to crack on with the boat house. They’ll be here a week today and he’ll be here the Monday after to go through the plans for the hall properly. Slight delay but at least things are moving.’
Rosie left to meet Autumn at the stables for her riding lesson and I returned to the boxes but I’d only removed a handful of photos before I sat back on my heels with a sigh. Flynn really wouldn’t be on site until a week on Monday? I’d have to wait a whole fortnight until I saw him again? That was too far away. I’d treated him terribly since I’d returned to Willowdale – ran out of the pub when he turned up, barely exchanged three words with him outside The White Willow, ignored his request to meet up and talk, refused to call him personally to let him know it was okay to come to every part of Mum’s funeral, barely spoke to him when I begged him to come to the wake, but recommended him to my boss when Dougie let us down. That must have made him feel so used. And, worst of all, I’d unleashed all my frustration on him in the cellar and then I’d refused to admit that the reason things could never have worked with Graeme was because my feelings for Flynn had never changed. I was still just as deeply in love with him as I’d always been.
Last night, I’d realised something else – that a big part of the reason I’d never returned to Willowdale, despite that magnet pulling me back, was fear of Flynn rejecting me like I’d rejected him. I’d already lost Noah and could never have him back but I could pretend there was a possibility of having Flynn back as long as I didn’t try and fail.
I wished I’d kept his contact details. I’d have messaged him right now if I had. Mark would give me them but I didn’t want to drag him into it. I’d already made things difficult enough for my brother-in-law. This was something I had to do alone and I needed to do it now.
To Ark Building & Restoration Ltd
Hi Flynn, Mel here. You kindly gave me your contact details for when/if I was ready to talk. I wasn’t and I didn’t think I ever would be so I didn’t keep them but now I wish I had. If that offer to talk is still on the table while sober and not locked in a dark cellar, I’d really like to go for it. Name your time and place and I’ll bend over backwards to be there
A few minutes later, a message came through with the questionNow?and a postcode. Now? I guess there was no time like the present and it wouldn’t give me time to overthink it – or at least no longer than the car journey. It also meant I had no time to fret over what to wear or whether to do my make-up. I needed to go as I was. I pinged off a reply.
To Ark Building & Restoration Ltd
I’ll be there shortly
Five minutes later, I was in my car and on my way, heading in the direction of Whinlatter Forest. The satnav took me off a side road and down a track flanked by tall conifers. At the end of the track, I slammed on the brakes and leaned forward, eyes wide, hardly able to believe what I was seeing. The location was new to me but the house was as familiar as my own face. He’d only gone and done it! He’d built our dream home.
I stayed where I was for several minutes, mouth open, hand clutching my eternity ring through my pale lemon T-shirt, taking in the stunning timber-and-glass home with steel and stone accents blending beautifully within its woodland setting. It had never entered my head that Flynn would have done this.
Realising he was standing in the doorway watching me, I pulled over beside his van and exited my car but I only managed a few paces before a wave of emotion washed over me and the tears began. I wasn’t going to be able to get a sincere apology out or talk about the past if I started off with an emotional meltdown so I lifted my hand to my forehead to shield my eyes from the sun and subtly wiped at my cheeks at the same time. Being make-up free would serve me well as there’d be no mascara runs to give the game away.
Flynn joined me. ‘Surprise!’ he said, his voice hesitant, his forehead creased, as though unsure whether I’d see it as a good or bad surprise.
‘You built our house,’ I said, my voice coming out a little husky. I inwardly winced at the use of the wordour.Yes, it wasourdesign andourdream, but it had happened without me so it was Flynn’s and I had no right to stake a claim on it.
‘I did.’
‘You found some land.’
‘It was part of Angus’s dad’s farm. He died and it passed down to Angus and his brother. I asked if they had a pocket of land anywhere that they’d be willing to sell to me and they came up with this. Decades ago, it had become a dumping ground for knackered machinery and was no use to them so they gave me a good deal on the proviso I cleared it myself.’
‘It’s a beautiful spot.’
‘It didn’t look it back then. Do you want to see inside? Or we can go to the café in the forest if you’d prefer.’
‘No! I’d love to see inside.’ The exterior had already blown me away and there was no way I could leave without seeing the interior.
