Benji,
Letter number one, haha. You have a mighty big plan for our future if you’re already thinking of sharing our ‘love story’ with our grandkids. We still have to get through this pregnancy first, and right now it’s kicking my ass. I don’t think the baby likes me very much because I think I’m actually getting more sick. I’m sorry the food there sucks and it sounds like bootcamp is about to live up to its name, but at least you’ll be able to do lots of pushups, or whatever it is you military people do, by the time you’re done.
Honestly, I have no idea what you do in bootcamp, only that I imagine it sucks and is super hard. You’re already a much stronger person than I am. I don’t think I could make it through anything like that, especially if I had to share space with a bunch of smelly, gross guys. Ugh, I can’t even imagine. Just the thought alone is making me a little nauseous. But there’s something to be said for people willing to put themselves on the front lines to protect our country, no matter how stinky they may be. You should be proud of yourself for doing something as selfless as that. It gives me hope that things may work out after all.
I guess I could come to Kansas for your graduation ceremony, but I’ll have to ask the doctor since I’ll be like six months pregnant by then. I think I’d be okay to fly still though. I have an appointment next week so I’ll let you know when I speak with her. Yes, she’s the perfect doctor on paper, but I won’t know for sure until I meet with her next week for my appointment. I’m going to miss the woman who’s been helping me from the clinic, but she has a lot of faith that I'll like this OBGYN. From the sounds of it, everything I’m dealing with is pretty routine pregnancy stuff and is supposed to get better now that I’m further into the second trimester. I still have some morning sickness, but I am starting to get some of my energy back. I’m not sleeping like a lazy bum all day anymore so that’s nice.
I had to quit my job today at the Taco Shack, which sucks because I really want to save as much money as I can for the baby. I know your bonus helped a lot and we were able to buy everything I needed to decorate the nursery, but I’d like to help pay for stuff too. I just can’t keep relying on other people for rides to get to work now that I’m not within walking distance. I’ll find something closer out here and in the meantime, I’ll use my free time to start working on my diploma, since I’m now technically a drop out and it’s not the example I want to set for our baby. That and I can start decorating the house. I’m pretty excited actually. I’ve never had a space that was truly mine to decorate before and I never realized how much I’d enjoy making a space my home. I’ve put together a few concepts and I’m really happy with the looks of things.
Thanks for talking me into all of this. You’ve been surprisingly wonderful. I’ll admit, I didn’t see you being the guy you’ve been the last couple of weeks, but I really appreciate the effort. I know we have a long way to go but this is a really good start.
Xx,
Aria.
Eight
Making a house a home
Aria
June 2017
“I’m gonna just say it girl, you’re making the wrong choice here.” Demi states while looking around at my new house.
It looks nothing like when I moved in. I repainted everything with Tate and Demi’s help. The few things I needed for baby bean, Benji bought and the girls helped me put everything together and then smudge the hell out of the house.
“What? You don’t think these colors work for the living room?” I ask, raking my eyes over the sage green walls she’s staring at. Maybe it’s too earthy next to the macrame plant hangers on the walls?
“No, I’m not talking about that. Bitch, I mean this weird ass situation you’ve found yourself in. Benji is a grade A dickhead and the fact that we had to smudge the evil out of this house because his family is made up of demon energy is a problem.” She levels me with a look that’s brought grown ass men to their knees in front of me, but it doesn’t have the same impact on me.
“Oh please! You think your girl can’t handle herself? Who are you talkin’ to right now?” I joke. “Not to mention the fact that Tate will straight up shoot the motherfucker if he pulls any of his sideways ass bullshit again. I need you to remember that I’m not doing this for me. I’m in it for my little girl. I have to give her the best chance this life has to offer. I owe her a chance to get to know her dad and have that relationship.”
“Look at me. I know this. Iknow. I just want you to be careful. I don’t trust that man. His vibe ain’t right, I’m telling you,” she says, shaking her head.
“I love you for having my back. Just let me try this my way and if it doesn’t work, then at least I can say I did my due diligence to make shit work. At least I’ll have tried, you know?”
“All right Sis, we’ll try things your way. Just so you know, I’m gonna stay here until he gets back from bootcamp. You’re gonna need help and I’ve got a car.” She levels me with a no nonsense stare so I don’t shut her down. She knows I’m not good at accepting help. Then her glare turns into a smirk and I know she’s about to say something ridiculous. “Better make some room up in that bed because every night’s a sleepover up in here. Ayyye,” she laughs, while twisting and shaking her ass back into me.
It’s impossible not to laugh with her, so I do and dance along with her, pretending to slap that ass and grind on her like a dude would. This girl is more than my best friend. She’s my sister by choice. My family has shown me that not all families are made from blood. Niko, Demi, and Tate are my family. And now our baby bean.
“You’re not wrong, I guess. I could use the help to get everything in order,” I say seriously, after a minute of us goofing off. “I’ve gotta get a plan in place in case none of this works out. I need a new job and a secondary savings account. I’ll need to make a budget for food and stuff. B’s mom is supposed to stock the house each week since I’m stuck out here in the middle of nowhere without a car, but she’s not made one single attempt to do so. She’s managing his account to ensure all the bills are paid on time and that I’m eating proper meals, per Benji’s request, and I’m pretty sure she’s pocketing the money.”
“Excuse me?”
“I mean, at least the food allowance. Like, the lights are on and the water runs, so clearly she’s maintaining the essential bills, but I’ve been making sure the internet stays on so B can email me when he’s allowed to.”
“What the fuck? You should just let it get shut off so he notices. Although, I will say it’s messed up that you’re supposed to receive an allowance because he doesn’t want you to work. It’s a little controlling, don’t you think? Especially since you aren’t even allowed to access it yourself?”
“Yeah, I thought about it. I’m not trying to snitch her out though. I like that she’s keeping her distance. I don’t trust her and don’t want her here,” I say with a shrug. “As for the allowance thing, I totally agree with you, which is why I think it’s best to continue working and finish my education, you know? I got a hold of the community college and they offer an online course that allows me to finish school with a real diploma. The classes are taught via zoom and the tests are done in person at the college. Instead of taking the classes, I scheduled the tests for next week. If I pass, I’ll graduate before the year is up and I can start the online training for an IT job I found in a random ad online. It surprisingly looks really promising and they’re willing to hire on people with no experience. The job itself provides training that qualifies as an educational degree, sort of like going to trade school, but better.”
“Sounds a little too good to be true, yeah?” Dem’s perfectly arched eyebrows lift in skepticism.
“Yeah, I thought so too, but honestly I think it’s worth a shot. I’d be able to work from home and as long as I’m logging hours after the training course is complete, I can work at whatever times I need to, which means I can pull an extra job to stack them dollars. I wasn’t kidding. I need to pad that bank account so thick it could be shakin’ its ass for tips.” I tease.
“Oh my god, shut up!” she laughs.
“On a real note, I’m going to use my checking account for my household budget type stuff and then I’m going to have a secret savings, just in case. Sadly, you aren’t the only one who doesn’t have a whole lot of faith in this situation and I’ve seen my mom get left high and dry too many times to not have shit worked out.” I say sadly.
