She and Kali met for brunch, but Aurelia wasn’t very good company.Kali asked her a few times if she was alright and Aurelia finally came clean about her night out with Oliver.Once again, Aurelia found herself answering the questionDo you like him?in the affirmative, but how could she explain why liking him didn’t feel like enough to get over the hurdle of diving into a relationship when she couldn’t tell Kali about the shop and its characters?But, if she were honest with herself, it wasn’t just about her secret life in the shop, so Aurelia finally came clean about her ex’s parting words.
“‘Too much’?”Kali asked, frowning.“What was that supposed to mean?”
“I was really down about my mum dying, and then with Marigold getting sick, I think he just realized he was in for an indefinite period of me crying all the time.”
“Yes, that’s what happens when someone’s grieving,” Kali said, angry on Aurelia’s behalf.
“But it was a lot to ask of him, to stay by me through that.And I’m still in it.I’m better now, but I think it’s still too much for someone to take me on.”
“I don’t like this,” Kali insisted.“That stupid Brendan made you feel ashamed of being sad when there’s no shame in it at all.What about Oliver—has he ever seen you get upset over your mum and Marigold?”
“Yep, a few times,” Aurelia admitted with a grimace.
“Well, after everything he told you last night, it doesn’t seem like he has a problem with that, does it?”Kali asked kindly.
Nodding slowly, Aurelia thought back over their Highgate walk, how Oliver had checked in to make sure she was alright, how it seemed like he wouldn’t have minded if she’d taken him up on his offer to leave and go for coffee instead.If Brendan had made her feel ashamed about feeling sad, Oliver made her feel like it was no trouble at all if she needed time to process those feelings before she could move past them.
After brunch, Aurelia was still thinking about Oliver, only this time she felt like she was seeing everything that had happened between them a little more clearly.She thought about how kind he’d been each time he’d seen tears brimming in her eyes.How sweet he’d been last night in wanting to celebrate her book with her.He’d shown her—not just last night, but for weeks—that he liked her.And maybe now, after what he’d said last night—that she wasjust right—it was time to believe there could be something more than friendship between them.
But there was still the small problem, the very minor one, of how she spent most of her nights.
That night, Aurelia was prepared to apologize to the characters for missing the party the night before, but then she remembered that they wouldn’t have noticed since she hadn’t been in the shop at midnight and so neither had they.She debated telling them but decided not to bring down the party mood with apologies and explanations—especially when Marmee might take it as a sign, one Aurelia would have to acknowledge this time, that she wasn’t prioritizing her ‘real’ life as she should.
After a few hours of celebrating the end of Vronsky’s new book, the characters had split into smaller clusters around the shop.Aurelia was standing alone with Elinor, whose perceptive nature meant she had no trouble sensing Aurelia was out of sorts.
“Has something happened, Aurelia?Your thoughts seem to be carrying you somewhere else this evening.”
“Do they?I’m sorry, I’ve been very distracted today.I’ll try to be more in the moment,” Aurelia said, making an effort to smile.
“Or you could share what has you looking so concerned?”Elinor suggested.
Aurelia scanned the room, careful to make sure no one else was within listening distance.
“We’ve talked before about Oliver, my editor,” she began.
Elinor smiled knowingly.
“Yes, we have indeed.”
“The other night… He let me know he’s interested in being together—as something more romantic than friends, or editor and writer.”
“As well he should.You are a successful woman of business and now letters.Do you share his interest?”
“I do—part of me does.But the other part is still unsure.”
Unconsciously, Aurelia’s eyes traveled around the room again, taking in the characters she’d grown to love.
“You have finished the book that will set Count Vronsky free from his past and ensure him a new future, but it seems there must be some way for you to do the same—ensure a new future for yourself, one that will allow you to open your heart to Oliver, or whomever you choose.”Elinor paused.“I am reminded of the story Marmee told us some weeks ago about your aunt, Marigold.Are we holding you back from returning Oliver’s affections?”
“If anyone is holding me back, it’s me,” Aurelia said with a grim smile.“I just can’t imagine trying to be in a relationship with someone when my nights are spent here, with all of you.”
Elinor opened her mouth to protest, but Aurelia quickly continued.
“No, sorry, that’s not what I meant.I’ve been better about getting out, I promise!It’s just that, with the shop being so… out of the ordinary, I’m not sure how I would keep a secret like that from someone.I mean, I’ve been keeping it a secret from my friends and family, but somehow it seems like keeping it from a boyfriend, from Oliver, would be too hard.”
“Too hard to even attempt?”Elinor asked.
“I think so.It’s easier to just keep things as they are.I’m happy enough for now.”
