“D’you want a drink baby?” she said to my dad.
“Sure honey. Get me a scotch. There should still be some ice in the freezer.” Dad sat up, his face ashen and wizened. He looked like he’d aged twenty years.Gone was the strapping CEO of a successful company and in its place was a shriveled, emaciated addict. He coughed and wheezed as he lit up a joint, the smell of marijuana permeating the air. I felt torn. Was this punishment enough? No, a voice from within said, it was just the start of his pain.
“What the fuck dad? Why are you wasting away in this hovel with a slut like her?!” I exclaimed.
“Don’t talk about Angel like that! I love her and soon we are going to get married.”
“Jesus dad, wake up! You’re her meal ticket. She doesn’t give a fuck about you, she’s playing you,” I retorted. I glanced at the side of the bed and saw a sawn-off shotgun propped up against the nightstand. Dad followed my gaze.
“You can’t be too careful. There are vultures everywhere, waiting to pick my bones clean,” he said, sounding like someone who definitely needed to be committed. At that point I had no idea who was crazier, me or him.
“What happened with you and Savannah dad?” I said, gauging his reaction. His eyes bugged out and he snarled at me.
“Don’t you ever mention that name in front of me you hear!”
“But why?”
“It was a long time ago, we were all stupidkids back then,” he said, beginning to howl in anguish. Angel came staggering in like a lost waif, two glasses of scotch in her bony hands, her nails still painted in a garish hue.
“What’s the matter baby?!” she cooed, slurring. Dad grabbed one of the glasses and drained it, still sniffling and wailing like I’d stabbed him. In a swift moment, he grabbed the shotgun and aimed it at me.
“Get out! Get out of my house! Leave us be! Go back to the fucking mansion that I left you, you fucking leech!”
“Braiden calm down!!” Angel squealed as I flung myself towards the floor. Dad pulled the trigger, but the gun wasn’t loaded.
I leapt up, anger overtaking me, and snatched the gun out of his trembling hands.
“You motherfucker! You were going to kill me, your only child, to live in this cesspit with a coke head whore?! Do you know what? Fuck it. OD and die for all I care! This is coming with me, before you do any more damage!” I grabbed a trash bag and stormed out of the house secreting the shotgun inside, like a veritable gunslinger. In the glorious fresh air, I knew that when the time came, I wouldn’t give a fuck if I had to end my dad’s miserable existence. I got into my car and drove back home, knowing that soon everything would be over.
I hid the gun in the back of my closet and got changed into my swim shorts deciding to go for a dipto cool myself off both mentally and physically. As I swam I began to daydream. I saw Savannah in her cheerleading outfit, her long hair shiny and flowing, the short skirt stopping just below her ass cheeks. I felt hard and wished that I could have fucked her. I wouldn’t have hurt her like my dad did. She would have been my girl. But then the thought struck me, if Savannah was a real person and still alive, then she would be the same age as my parents. Ew gross. That totally weirded me out and my erect cock quickly diminished. I would no longer have wet dreams about someone that was as old as my mom. I was still hungry for answers to understand this curse that had plagued me my whole life, so I got out of the pool and went to find my mom. Maybe she would give me a better answer than my dad did.
She was in her yoga room, surprisingly alone, sitting on the mat in a pigeon pose, her eyes closed as she meditated. I leaned against the wall, contemplating whether I should interrupt her or not.
“What is it Caspian?” she asked, her eyes open, but still holding the pose.
“What happened in high school with Savannah?” I said, figuring she’d either be mad or tell me the truth. She seemed startled and got up grabbing a towel and dabbing her face.
“That’s a name I’ve not heard for a long time,” she answered, narrowing her eyes, “who told youabout her?! “
“Never mind who told me. You all hurt her didn’t you? Why? She was your friend,” I said, feeling awash with a bunch of different feelings, anger, betrayal, sadness and the need for revenge.
“Savannah was a slut who thought she was better than everyone else. Her parents were filthy rich, and she was beautiful. Your dad and I weren’t rich back then, and I didn’t look a million dollars like I do now.”
“So y’all beat on her because you were jealous?” I said, incredulous.
“How did you know about all that?! Someone squealed didn’t they? Was it your father?”
“No. I saw it in my dreams,” I said, glad to actually share my burden with someone, even if it was my cretin of a mother.
“Caspian are you serious? You are not doing drugs are you? When you go to college, what you do is your business, but when you’re under my roof I won’t have you being a junkie.”
“Like you give a fuck about me mom. You don’t care anymore; in fact I don’t think you ever did. I don’t fit into your life anymore because you are fucking around pretending to be in love with Youri to make yourself feel valid and wanted. He’s only with you for the lifestyle you can give him. He doesn’t love you. No one could love you!” I snarled and then I felt the sharp sting of her hand as she struck my face.
“I knew there was something wrong with you thatnight we saw you on camera wandering around the grounds when you were six. You said something about that fucking doll and your dreams then. That’s why I buried it. You went rooting around in the trash cans and sliced open your feet with a broken bottle.”
I bristled, rubbing my cheek.
“You will all pay for what you did to her, and it will be sooner rather than later,” I growled, walking out of the yoga studio.
