––––––––
IMAKE MY WAY INTOthe kitchen at the fire station and hear a text ping on my phone.
Blue:You want dinner tonight? I'm making a casserole.
Yeah, she's in my phone as Blue. I smile to myself. We have gotten into a routine - kind of like a married couple but without the benefits. Ah, the benefits. It’s been a while...a long while, but Christ, my mind keeps going there when it comes to Sophie.
She's fucking gorgeous.
I can't ignore the fact. She’s beautiful and sexy, and those legs - Jesus, they go on for miles, and I keep seeing them all the time. They are in pyjama shorts when she comes downstairs in a morning when I've finished a night shift. They're in those fucking pyjama shorts again when she’s going up to bed when I get home. I can't deny it any longer, or my dick can’t - it likes her...a lot.
It's getting ridiculous - I have to jerk off every night thinking about what that pussy of hers would be like. I feel guilty for having these thoughts about another woman, a woman that isn't Violet, even if it is only sexual. But that body though...I could do things to that body. I have to stop myself from getting hard just thinking about her now, at work, for fuck’s sake. She is stirring feelings in me that I haven't felt in, well, years. She is sexy as hell. I hate that I'm becoming a slave to my body, but my body says it wants Sophie.
She is great - terrific. We are getting on amazingly well, but the flirting is getting more intense. I think back to last night. After finishing my shift at nine, I got home and walked into the house. I immediately heard her voice as I opened the door, a voice that warms my insides so much that I push it to the back of my mind and don’t think about it too much.
“Big Guy, is that you?”
I smile. Who else would it be? But that's what happens every time I walk in when she’s home. Truth is, when she’s at work, I miss those words. It’s nice having company - something I never thought I’d admit. She calls me ‘Big Guy’ all the time, and I would never admit this either, but I like it. Makes me feel powerful. There is obviously some neanderthal man inside me somewhere.
“Yeah, Blue, who else?”
I walk into the living room where she is sat on the couch, feet up in her little short pyjamas with the strappy top. I mean, how much was a guy supposed to be able to take? Wrapped in a blanket and her hair falling all around her, with her big fluffy socks. Fucking adorable.
“Hey! Have you eaten? I made dinner earlier and left some in the crockpot in case you wanted some?”
“Great, I'm starving.”
Her eyes flashed - she loved feeding me. I’ve never eaten so well. I usually have to go to my parent's house to eat real food, but I have home-cooked food for me every night in my own home—no complaints from me.
“How was work?” she asked.
I shrugged. “It was fine - no call-outs today - routine stuff and a bit of training. How was yours?”
She rolled her eyes. “Your brother is a diva.”
I laughed. “Tell me something I don't know.”
“He was pulling a strop because of some problem with his bike. Bet he was fun growing up.”
“He was ten times worse.”
I walk into the kitchen and start to plate up the dinner she made for me. She came and sat on the worktop to talk to me. All I could think of was walking over to her, putting my hands on her bare knees and spreading her legs, sliding myself in between them and having them wrap around me. I had to divert my mind to terrible things, women with facial hair, overweight women with leggings on, the queen - anything that would distract me - why does my mind keep going to the gutter when I'm around her?
“Dad came into work today.”
I stopped what I was doing and looked at her. “He did?”
Since those guys came into the bar, she went to see her dad and told him she was done. He broke down and finally admitted he had a problem and promised he would go to a meeting.
“Yeah, he seemed a little better - said he hadn't been out anywhere - I hope he's telling the truth, I have my doubts. He says he's gone to a GA meeting, but it can't be this easy. I'm not sure we're out of the woods yet. I guess only time will tell. I've told him I’d go round for dinner tomorrow.”
I nodded. I think she’s right - no way can it be that easy. And I’ve done a little digging around on this Phoenix Winters arsehole. He’s not good people. If her dad owes him money, he will not let it lie, and he’s not the kind of guy that will take a tenner a month. When I try to think of a solution, the only thing I can think of is Robyn. I know it’s not fair to go to her about this because she’s got money, but she wouldn't want Sophie to be in danger, and she could maybe pay her back. I don't want this guy anywhere near her, especially with how he was looking at her. Sophie would fall out with me if I told Robyn. It doesn’t solve the problem once and for all anyway, her dad would go out and run up more debt.
“Let's hope so, give him the benefit of the doubt until proved otherwise, I guess. Have you heard from this Phoenix guy?” I mean, who the fuck has a name like Phoenix?
Something flashed on her face - fear, shame? Something...I couldn't tell what.
“No, nothing.”
