And I know that I’m going to do everything I possibly can to get him into that treatment program.
I squeeze my little brother’s cold hand.
“Miles, you’re going to get into that treatment program. I’m going to work something out…
“Ipromise.”
I gaze anxiously at the drink list. Suddenly, even a five dollar happy hour martini seems steep.
“Just water for me, please,” I tell the server, handing the menu backover to her. She frowns at me as she takes it. I can’t blame her, she probably works for tips.
“Babe, just order a drink,” moans my boyfriend, Blake, as he wraps an arms around my shoulder. He looks at the server. “She’ll have a gin and soda, make it a double.”
“Ooh, one for me too, please!” my friend, Amanda, adds cheerfully.
“And I’ll have a whiskey on the rocks,” Blake says.
The server leaves, and I squirm slightly under Blake’s arm. I appreciate he’s trying to help, but I’m just not in the mood for that right now.
“You don’t have to do that,” I tell him. “It’s my choice to save money for Miles. You shouldn’t have to buy my drinks.”
“Well, I like to spoil my girl,” Blake replies. His other hand reaches for my knee, but I slide away from him. I feel my face heating slightly. BlakeknowsI hate it when he does that in front of Amanda.
She notices our awkward encounter, and politely looks away, scanning the crowded bar. She’s not the settle-down type. She has a new partner, girlfriend, or boyfriend every month, and she likes it that way. Ever since we met in middle school, she’s always been the adventurous one, the flirty one, the fun one.
I’m the opposite. Practical, down-to-earth, dependable Paige. Blake and I started dating in high school, and he’s the only person I’ve been with. But I don’t mind. I know what to expect. It’s important for me to have stability in my life.
Even if sometimes, it’s a little difficult. I can sense Blake stiffening as I pull away from his advance. I hope he’s not upset. Thank god, Amanda turns back to us before he can say anything.
“Isn’t this bar cool? Ilovethe vibe.”
I have to admit, I hadn’t really noticed. It’s pretty dark in here, a little too dim if you ask me. It’s lit with red lights, and the pounding music is starting to give me a headache.
“How did you find it?” I ask her.
“Someone from my philosophy class,” she replies. “She’s really cool, she knows where all the underground parties are. She said there might bescoutshere.”
“Scouts for what?” Blake says.
Amanda shrugs. “I don’t know. Oh, that reminds me! Are you still coming on the ski trip?” she asks us. “If we book our flights now, the rates will be lower! I have this app that tells me when they’re at their lowest…”
“I don’t know, Amanda,” I reply. “I’m trying to save money for Miles’s treatment. It’s really expensive.”
“How expensive?” she asks, her brow furrowed.
“It’sridiculous,” Blake interrupts, with a condescending shake of his head. “Babe, you shouldn’t be paying for something like that. Miles should be getting his shit together, not asking you for handouts.”
I can feel my face redden. “He’s not asking me for a handout, Blake. I offered to pay for the treatment program for him. He’s struggling right now, and he needs a program that will support him…”
“What heneedsis to buckle down and tough it out. It doesn’t helpwhen you coddle him like you do.” Blake takes a swig of his whiskey.
“I’m not coddling him,” I reply. I try to shrug his arm off my shoulder, but he doesn’t get the hint. “Substance use disorder is a real mental health condition, and it requires treatment just like any other disorder. A treatment program that understands and addresses the root causes of addiction, preferably one that’s trauma-informed…”
Blake snorts. “Seriously,everythingis about trauma these days. If you ask me, that’s what’s causing all of these problems…”
He continues on his tirade, but I can’t listen to it again. He’s always felt this way about my brother, and it’s getting worse and worse. At first, I had the same opinion about substance use. I thought it was something that was easy to overcome, if you just tried hard enough. But the more research I did about it, the more I’ve learned that addiction is a mental health disorder, and that, while it’s important not to enable people, it’s also important to be empathetic and compassionate toward those who are struggling with it.
“And it’s causing a big drain because it costs so much,” Blake is saying. “I don’t even knowwhywe pay taxes…”
