I’m in the middle of closing the door behind me, bouncing John up and down as he spittles all over my shoulder. He just woke up, and I figured I would sneak him out of the room before he started screaming for his mother, who is currently passed out on the bed.
I turn to find Charlie in the hall, biting her lip and looking much less confident than I’ve ever seen her.
“Yes?”
Charlie sighs with a force that would usually imply I’ve done something terribly wrong. But rather than accuse me, she blurts out, “I’m leaving.”
I still, but that mistake is only for a moment, for John opens his mouth to protest. I quickly resume my bouncing regimen, and my son goes quiet.
“You’re leaving?”
Charlie puts her hands on her hips, her elbows jutting through her silky black hair. “Well, that’s what I just said, isn’t it?”
I gesture with my head for her to follow me down the hall. She’s clearly agitated, and I don’t wish to wake Wendy.
As we pace, Charlie continues. “Well, aren’t you going to say something?”
“What? Are you hoping for a harsh rebuke? Would you like me to offer you a raise? Or perhaps I should threaten your life should you wish to leave.”
Charlie shoots me a rather annoyed glance.
Now that we’re far enough down the hall that I’m certain any outburst from my son won’t wake his mother, I stop and sigh. “Would you like to inform me why you’re leaving?”
Charlie bites her lip again, glancing to the side. “I don’t want you to think it’s you. After all you’ve done for me, rescuing me from that brothel, the turn my life almost took…”
I wave my hand through the air at her. “Obviously it’s got nothing to do with me. But I’m still curious as to the reason.”
Charlie crosses her arms and rolls her eyes, presumably at my arrogance. I feel the corner of my lip twitch.
“Did I ever tell you what I used to dream of as a young girl? Back before my family was murdered and our estate seized?”
“Not that I can recall.”
“I used to dream that one day my father would call me into his office. That he’d tell me he was giving me an allowance like he did my brothers, one I could make use of as I willed. I wanted to open a shop. The idea was that I’d sell my inventions.” She smiles at herself, but in an abashed sort of way.
“Is that what you’re to do then? Open a shop and sell those?” I say, glancing toward the miniature cannon in the holster at her side.
“No, I…maybe?” she says, looking unsure. “I want to teach women to defend themselves. Whether that’s with these”—her hand brushes the barrel—“or some other means, I don’t know. But I want to help them somehow. And I don’t know that I can do that here.”
I pause, watching her carefully. “And Maddox?”
Charlie stiffens. “What about him?”
“Have you told him your plans to leave?”
She crosses her arms, glancing down at her shifting feet. “Not yet.”
“I was under the impression that something between the two of you changed back at the oceanside cottage. Was I wrong?”
Charlie ponders that for a moment. “No, something did change. I think almost losing me woke him up a little.”
I crane my head. “But?”
Charlie sighs and leans her back against the wall. “But something changed for me, too. Perhaps this betrays my lack of romantic aptitude, but I don’t want to have to almost die for someone to realize they don’t want to lose me. I think…I think I might be worth someone figuring that out before that point.”
“And if you tell him and he wants to come with you?”
Charlie purses her lips together, then says, “If he wants to chase me around the world, I won’t stop him.”
