More tears fall as a puff of laughter drifts over her lips. “This is why it’s so hard to leave you. You’re so good and loving. Thank you for always being the man I needed you to be.”
She leans in close and kisses me on the cheek then turns to go.
Harvey stops her at the door, wagging his tail like he always does. She rubs his head before picking up her bags and walking out the door.
I watch her drive away, feeling the pain of loss even though I know this isn’t really the end.
I’m not letting her run from us. I’ll give Camila a few hours before I go after her, because I know this isn’t what she really wants.
“Don’t worry, Harvey.” He looks from the door at me. “She’ll be back.”
Camila
I sit cross-leggedon the rug of my condo, pajama pants on, oversized t-shirt swallowing me, curls matted from crying into my pillow. And don’t even get me started on my puffy cry face and mascara-stained eyelids.
When times are hard, I like to marinate in my ugly.
And these are hard times.
My chest hurts like something sharp is lodged there. Everything feels permanent and irreparable and hopeless…even though it’s only been four hours since I broke up with Hess.
A knock comes on the door, and I immediately freeze.
“Camila?” Carly’s voice comes from the hall.
“Open up. It’s us,” Blair says.
My girls. My safety net.
How did they?—
I fling open the door, and Carly, Juliet, Emma, and Blair crowd in with wide eyes, like they’re seeing me for the first time. And maybe they are. They’ve seen me angry; they’ve seenme stubborn. But they’ve never seen this puffy-eyed, red-nosed, shoulders-shaking version of myself.
“What are you doing here?”
“Hess called us,” Emma answers. “He didn’t want you to be alone.”
“Hess called you?” My words wobble with emotion.
“Cam,” Carly whispers, already pulling me into her arms. “Oh my gosh.”
I let her hug me as the others pile around.
Blair pats my back robotically. “I’ve never seen you cry before.”
“I’m getting divorced.” The words come out in an embarrassing wail.
Juliet’s eyes narrow. “Wait. You asked him for a divorce?”
“I don’t like myself either.” I pull back from the hug, leading them all to my couch.
Emma frowns. “But you fell in love with each other.”
“I know, but I’ve seen enough to know that love doesn’t matter.” I wipe at my face even though the tears keep streaming. “Marriage doesn’t work. It’s a failed institution. People cheat. They lie. They change their minds. Why would I think my love is any different, especially when I’m a part of it? I’m Glen Lucas’s daughter. My genetic DNA is made up of a manipulative, emotionally stunted man. That’s who I am too.”
“No. You’re not like that.” Emma’s voice is soft but steady. “You’re not Glen Lucas. You’re not those people who lie and cheat. You and Hess aren’t them.”
I shake my head. “Maybe Hess is different, but I’m not. I always run. Every relationship, every guy. I get bored or angry or suffocated, and I push them away, or I leave. I’m no better than my biological father. Who’s to say I won’t do that with Hess?”
