Benjamin, Vico and Nathan aren’t back, and the icy reception I’ve had from Emily hasn’t thawed. That only leaves one obstacle, like usual.
I fill a thermos of coffee and take it out to Torino. It’s coming up to 10:30 p.m. If I’m not careful, I’ll be more than a few minutes late and blow everything.
“Here.” I thrust the mug into Torino’s hand.
“What’s this?”
“Coffee. I’m going to bed. Emily’s in there with me. I’m sure her goons will be downstairs?” My eyebrow lifts in question, hoping he’ll give up and go home.
“Yeah. Any idea when Vico will be back?” I stand and cross my arms. He should know better than to ask me that. Nobody knows Benjamin’s movements apart from him. “Stupid question.”
“It’s fine. You’ve been here nearly twenty-four-seven the last few days. Go home before you fall down. You’re no good wiped out.” I read the debate as it flickers across his face, weighing his options.
“The phone is on. Lock the door and get some rest.” He slurps the coffee and heads over to the elevator to take him out of my hair. The bolt on the door slides into place, and I dash to my room, putting my running gear to good use once again, tie up my hair and shove the treacherous phone into a small backpack.
It’s a race now to get to the same spot in time. I don’t even know what I want to say, or how to get out of the mess I’ve made, but I do know that re-evaluating the plan is needed or I’ll lose before getting close to the finish. I’ve become everything my mother was in the end—vindictive and spiteful. That’s not what I want. Not when I’m with Benjamin, anyway.
My heart stretches inside my chest, and I stand still, composing myself as I try to un-jumble my mind.
“Hope?” Emily calls out. I look up at the bedroom door, more panic setting in. She can’t see me leave. “Hope? I’m going.”Is she?I sigh out the breath I’ve been holding and head for the hallway to find her.
Her head whips back at me the moment I find her, eyes like venom looking me over. “Quinn’s called. The car’s downstairs for me.” Right.
“Did he mention Benjamin?”
“Only that he’ll be a couple of hours.” Good. I’d never be able to explain myself if he caught me.
“Going out?” Emily looks at me, frowning at my clothes.
“No, working out,” I reply.
“At this hour?”
“Yes. It’s what he expects of me. I work hard for this,” I snap, brushing my hands over my figure.
“Okay,” she says, heading for the door. Good. Go. My eyes flick around, and I grab the door as she exits. I glance at my watch.
“Let’s do brunch sometime?” I offer, at least trying to keep the peace. She doesn’t answer, just nods and walks away to her asshole of a husband.
I give her precisely ten minutes before grabbing everything I need and heading out myself, taking the elevator to the basement where the car is parked. I can access the road without the desk clerk noticing anything from there, and I’m not risking the fact that Emily might not have quite left.
The air is fresh as I exit out onto the street. I orientate myself and start a gentle jog towards the park. The cold pulls down into my lungs and burns my throat. To distract myself from the activities ahead, I focus on my breathing, taking small breaths to minimise the ache in my chest from the cold air. It’s a twenty-five-minute walk on a good day. I have under twenty, so I’d have to sprint.
The darkness closes in around me as I enter the park. I don’t want to be here and am not about to make myself any more of a target than I already am to Andreas, so I change my approach and wait in the shadows, just like he did on our first meet.
The night hasn’t reached its darkest, and there’s still a faint glow from the city. My feet step carefully on the grass as I pull my body out of sight behind some foliage.
As the minutes draw out, my nerves begin to vibrate around my body, charging every part of me like I’ve been injected with a hit of adrenaline spiked with a cocaine chaser.
My eyes dart from left to right, checking all around as I feel the blackness begin to swallow me whole. And then, just as I’m convinced I’m hidden from the world, a shadow approaches. Slowly.
I hold my nerve for a moment more, waiting to see if it’s Andreas. He shows me his profile as he turns out towards the expanse of the park. The frown he’s sporting is visible even through the blackness.
He sweeps the vicinity before digging into his pocket. The gentle vibration in my bag is muffled enough that it doesn’t give away my position. One more minute and then I’ll show myself.
I suddenly wish I still had the gun from last night, but every time I contemplate what I’d have to do with it, I’m glad I’m not in that position.
There were many times, especially when I was young, with some of the men when I had to fuck to earn my rent. I’d imagine killing them sometimes. For what they said to me. For how they treated me. Sure, they were paying for it, but I was a girl. Any innocence I had managed to cling to burned to dust under how some of them treated me. Of course, it wasn’t always that way. The caliber of client improved, the money improved, but it didn’t erase my imagination. But holding the gun to Quinn, I realised that it’s not something I’d be able to do lightly. Not the way Benjamin or Vico could.
