“They’re tough. I think the season is harder on them than the players, honestly.”
Fabian smiled at that. “Can you imagine me sitting with the wives at the games?”
No. For lots of reasons, Ryan couldn’t imagine that at all. “I would never expect you to do that.”
“I know. Of course not. And,” Fabian’s cheeks colored, “I’m not comparing myself to your teammates’wives. I’m not that delusional. We’re not even—” Fabian crossed his arms, hugging himself tightly, and pursed his lips as if to stop his words from escaping. “Do you think—?”
Ryan sat on the end of the bed so they could be closer to eye-level with each other. “Think what?”
Fabian reached for Ryan’s hands and held them. “Would I be out of line if I asked if I could be your boyfriend?”
Ryan’s heart bounced excitedly. “You want to be my boyfriend?”
Fabian stared down at their joined hands. “I know that our schedules are very hectic, but yes. I’d like to explore this. If you’re willing.”
“Fabian. Look at me.” That was probably a mistake because Ryan forgot how awful his mouth looked. He noticed Fabian’s flinch when he turned his eyes up. Ryan tugged him closer. “My life is a fucking mess, but the one thing I know for sure is that I like being with you. And I would like to be with you as much as possible.”
Fabian squeezed Ryan’s hands, and his lips curved up into an adorable smile. Ryan decided to say the rest.
“I’mhappywhen I’m with you. This probably sounds ridiculous, but I haven’t felt happy in so long. I can’t even remember. So...yeah. I want to be your boyfriend.” He huffed an embarrassed little laugh. “I can’t believe I finally got to say that out loud after all these years.”
He held his breath and waited for Fabian to respond. For a long moment, Fabian didn’t say anything, and Ryan was worried he had come on too strong. Maybe he was putting too much pressure on him.
Then Fabian said, “I wish I could kiss you right now.”
Ryan’s heart soared. “Me too.”
As a compromise, Fabian retrieved one of his hands from Ryan’s, kissed the tips of his fingers, and pressed them gently to Ryan’s lips. It was one of the sweetest kisses Ryan had ever received.
They ended up spooned together in bed, snuggled under the blankets. Ryan thought Fabian had fallen asleep until he heard him say, “There’s always been something about you. I’ve always been drawn to you. Is that weird?”
Ryan considered it. “I don’t know. But I feel the same way.”
“When you walked into the store where I work, I was shocked. And then...” Fabian turned in Ryan’s arms to face him. “I had this overwhelming feeling ofrelief. Like this was what I’d been waiting for. This was what was missing. You.”
Ryan stared at what he could see of Fabian in the dark, completely speechless.
“Sorry. That probably sounds nuts.”
“That’s how I felt,” he said quietly. “Like I’d finally found you. I didn’t know I’d been looking but...I found you.”
Fabian smiled so brightly that Ryan could see it even in the darkness. “Then we’d better stick together.”
Chapter Twenty-Two
Ryan groaned as a ball sailed over his leg and into the back of the net behind him.
“Not as easy as it looks, is it?” Wyatt said gleefully.
Ryan stood up with some effort. He wasn’t used to having giant goaltender pads on his legs. Around him, the kids were laughing and cheering—it had been their idea for Ryan and Wyatt to switch roles for today’s floor hockey match. Ryan had let in about a million goals.
“All right,” Ryan grumbled. “I think I’m done.”
“You’re like the worst goalie I’ve ever seen,” Xander said.
“Yeah, well.” It was the best comeback Ryan could come up with. In truth, he had expected to be better at goaltending. He was a defenseman, after all. It wasn’tthatdifferent.
He removed the glove and blocker, and then the mask. His hair was embarrassingly sweaty for a friendly floor hockey game against a bunch of kids.
