“I have no idea.”
“It’s awful. He’s too good for this.”
“He didn’t fight him,” Tarek pointed out. “You could tell he was trying to talk the guy out of it.”
Fabian pressed his lips together. His eyes were stinging. It was true, Ryan hadn’t fought him.Whyhadn’t he fought him? Not for Fabian’s sake, surely.
“Come on,” Tarek said, covering one of Fabian’s hands with his own. “Let’s get out of here, huh? I think there’s karaoke happening tonight at the Lighthouse. I could see if Vanessa—”
“Thanks,” Fabian said. “But I think I’d like to go home.”
Tarek nodded, then stood. “Then let’s go.”
Ryan had left his apartment the moment he’d gotten the message.
Fabian: Please come over. I know it’s late. I know we said tomorrow. But I need to see you.
It had been a long fucking day, and Ryan’s mouth was swollen and sore, but if Fabian wanted to see him, Ryan was there.
Fabian was standing outside his building when Ryan arrived, which he didn’t like seeing at all. “What are you doing out here? You shouldn’t be—”
But Fabian cut him off by engulfing him in a fierce hug.
Ryan didn’t understand what was happening, so he just wrapped his arms around Fabian and held him tight. It wasn’t until he heard Fabian sniffing that he finally asked, “What’s wrong?”
Fabian’s reply was so muffled, Ryan couldn’t make it out. Fabian’s fingers dug into Ryan’s back, and Ryan was getting scared. He’d never seen him so upset.
“Hey,” he said softly, “it’s okay. I’m here. What is it?”
Fabian finally loosened his hold and looked up at him with damp eyes. “I watched the game.” He reached up and brushed his fingers very gently against Ryan’s split and swollen lip. “I saw what happened.”
Ryan swallowed. His throat felt like sandpaper. “I wish you hadn’t.”
“You didn’t fight him.”
“No.”
“Why not? Isn’t that what you do?”
Ryan cradled Fabian’s face with one palm. “I didn’t want to.” He stroked Fabian’s cheek with his thumb. “I don’t think I want to fight anymore.”
Fabian covered Ryan’s hand with his own. “Then don’t.”
“I don’t know if I’ll have a choice. Coach was pretty pissed with me.” What Coach Cooper had said was that he had plenty of decent fourth-line defensemen he could call up from the farm team, and all of them were younger and faster than Ryan. If Ryan didn’t want to do his job anymore, he could be easily replaced. But Ryan didn’t need to tell Fabian any of that.
“Are you all right? God, your mouth must hurt.”
“It doesn’t feel great, but nothing is broken or anything.” Ryan attempted a smile. “Didn’t lose any teeth.”
Fabian squeezed him again. “That was so fucking scary. I hated it. I don’t want to watch hockey. I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay. You don’t have to.” Ryan actually didn’t like the idea of Fabian watching him play. And he especially didn’t like the idea of him watching him fight. Ryan wanted to take care of him, for them to take care of each other. Fabian would make him laugh and try new things, and Ryan would make him feel safe and loved. Because those were things that Ryan coulddo. Effortlessly.
If Fabian wanted that.
“We should go inside,” Ryan suggested. Fabian nodded against his chest, then pulled away with another sniffle.
When they were inside the apartment, Fabian said, “I can’t watch you get hurt. How do all those hockey wives do it?”
