‘Enough about me,’ he replied. ‘Let’s talk about you. How are you feeling? How’sthepain?’
‘I feel like I should be at home,’ she said. ‘I told the nurse this could hang on until tomorrow, but she insisted I come in now. Still, I suppose the poor woman’s only doing what she thinksisbest.’
As much as Dan wanted to keep up his mother’s pretence, something inside seemed to break and the last of his denial suddenly drained from his body. Neither of them knew exactly how long his mother had left and from what the doctor had said, this could be his last chance to tell her how much he loved her. He needed his mum to know how thankful he was for everything she’d done for him and how she’d been the best mother a son could ever wish for. All things that had to be said before it wastoolate.
Regardless of any acceptance, Dan couldn’t stop the lump suddenly forming in his throat. He swallowed hard, but he still couldn’t manage to speak and, not wanting to break down completely in front of his mum, he hastily got up from his seat and headed for the window, determined to compose himself. Looking out, he realised she’d been right when she’d said how beautiful the gardens were. The hyacinths, tulips and primroses brought new life to a place dealing indeath.
‘I know about the lymphedema, Mum,’ he said, at last, getting thewordsout.
Awaiting a response, none was forthcoming and he turned to lookather.
As if feeling his gaze, she began straightening the fold in her blanket and refused to look at him while she processed hisadmission.
‘Jill told you then?’ sheeventuallysaid.
Dan re-took his seat at his mother’s bedside. ‘Yes.’ He took hold of her hand. ‘Shedid.’
Finally, his mum faced him head on. ‘And you know what that means?’ she asked. There was no disguising the upset in hervoice.
‘Ido.’
In a single breath, the last of his mother’s fighting spirit seemed to vanish. Tears suddenly rolled down her cheeks as she, at last, succumbed to the reality that this was the end. Before Dan knew it, she all at once threw her arms around him and, welcoming her embrace, he hugged her tight inreturn.
‘Oh Dan, we’ve always been a team,’ she said. ‘And I love you so much, it hurts. What am I going to do without you? What will you dowithoutme?’
Dan began to cry too. ‘I don’t know, Mum,’ he replied. Finally, he let his own tears flow. ‘I honestlydon’tknow.’
25
Annabel,book in hand and feet up on sofa, stared at the page before her. Having read and re-read the same passage twice now, the words wouldn’t seem to go in. She let the book drop and didn’t see the point in trying for a third time. Not really in the right frame of mind, reading took too muchconcentration.
‘Anyone home?’ Rebeccacalledout.
Despite not being in the mood for yet another welfare check, she decided her sister’s company was better than just sitting there doing nothing. Even if she didn’t understand why she and Katy kept popping in to make sure all was well. In her view, their visits were completely unnecessary. She might have been stood up, however, Annabel had no intentions of sinking back into a dark abyss of despair. If there was one thing the other night’s fiasco with Dan had taught her, it was that men simply weren’t worth it. She pictured her husband.Yes I’m including you in that, Tom,she silently told him. As far as she was concerned, she was better off on her own. Men either died or simply buggered off never to be seenagain.
‘There you are,’ said Rebecca, appearing in thedoorway.
‘Yep,’ Annabel replied. ‘As you can see, I’mstillhere.’
‘There’s no need to be like that,’ said her sister. She entered the room and plonked herself down in the nearest armchair. ‘So have you heardfromhim?’
Wow,thought Annabel. Her sister was certainly quick off the mark today. The woman usually partook in at least five minutes of general chit-chat before going in for the kill. Then there was another five checking on her mentalhealth.
‘Well?’ askedRebecca.
‘No, I haven’t heardfromhim.’
‘Not even aphonecall?’
‘Nope.’
Rebeccasighed.
‘And before you start telling me all over again that there’s probably a simple explanation,’ said Annabel. The last thing she needed was more sisterly advice. ‘Let me save you the trouble. Whatever the explanation is, Idon’tcare.’
‘That’s a bit harsh.Whatif… ?’
Annabel refused to let her mind gothere.
