“You can’t believe that,” My voice broke through. “It wasn’t your fault.”
“But it was, if I hadn’t been drunk that night, I would have gotten back to the station sooner. I would have gone back to the house to sneak in through my bedroom window to see my bride-to-be before our wedding. But I couldn’t do any of that because I was too drunk.”
That explained why he didn’t care for alcohol.
“If I hadn’t been impaired, I would have been able to save them.”
“Or you would have died with them,” I whispered.
“So be it. I tried to kill myself many times after the fact. I drank myself to death for months.” He sniffled into the phone. “I’m not telling you this because I feel like my story is worse. I’m telling you because I’m tired of running and staying in the dark. I know you are too. You’ve stopped wearing the wigs and the contacts as much. Hell, you flew to see the people that you haven’t spoken to or seen in ten years. The people that hurt you. I’m telling you my story because I want you to know all of me. The good, the bad, and the grouchy. I can’t hide anymore if I want to be with someone. I can’t run if I want to heal from my past. I know you need to heal too. I know you don’t want to go there and see your father but maybe it will be good for you. Maybe there will be something unexpected waiting for you beyond the doors of your sibling’s home.” He stopped and chuckled darkly before he continued. “And maybe, you’ll get to knock your pops on his ass.”
I couldn’t stop the smile from taking over my face. “I like that idea.”
“Heal, Aiyanna,” he whispered. “Heal with me.”
Chapter Thirty-Two
Aiyanna
Kota didn’t sayanything as we rode back to Kia’s home. I could see the crisscross of scratches on his forearms from the corner of my eye and I only feltslightlyguilty about it. He put the SUV in park in front of their home and sighed.
“He promised he wouldn’t speak to you.” Kota looked conflicted.
I nodded my head. I was only here because of Derek. If he hadn’t unloaded his demons at my feet I would have been on a flight back home already. He had been right though, I needed this. I needed to knock him right into the sand and stomp on him.
Right before Kota opened the door he looked back at me. “The twins love their grandpa, remember that.”
I would try my best to do so, but I made no promises, to him or myself. From the living room, I could see the girls jumping on the trampoline in the back. Islah was sitting on the couch downing alcohol like it was going out of style and Maze was over mashing the potatoes. Kia leaned against the wall in the dining room and wouldn’t look at me.
“You created quite a stir,” Kia said under his breath.
I rolled my eyes. “Yeah?”
“Yeah, six people have come to borrow sugar, eggs, and salt in the last thirty minutes.”
I had forgotten just how quickly word spread in the res. I sucked air in between my front teeth. “Sorry.”
He shrugged. “Somehow they came to borrow stuff but we got lots of treats as a gift for you being returned.”
“Returned?” I cocked an eyebrow and tilted my head. I couldn’t bring myself to look past him into the backyard. Where I knew I would find my father.
“Ya know, they believe that you are a blessing to our people. You were returned and it shows a sign of good faith.” Kia shrugged. “I gave up on spiritual things a long time ago.”
I wanted to agree but I couldn’t. The only thing that had gotten me through everything had been the thought that my mother was there guiding me and that Vivian and Jack were at peace. I had let go of my heritage. I had tried to forget where I came from. Not the spirit world.
Kota bumped his hip into mine as he piled a plate high with food. “Who were you talking to at the park?”
“Derek that guy that’s going to beat your ass someday.”
Kota scoffed. “Doubtful.”
Then I remembered the rumor about the SEAL that had somehow stolen my heart right from under my nose, the rumor about his actual profession. “Not doubtful at all. He’s a sniper for the SEALs.”
He choked on the dessert he had popped into his mouth. “What?”
I shrugged. “He’s gonna tear you apart. But I’ll have him go easy on you.”
His face went red. Whether it was with anger or embarrassment I wasn’t sure. “You can’t date a SEAL!”
