I head for the kitchen and set the platter down. Haley comes around me and looks down at the cookies as I open the platter.
“Oh my gosh, these look so good. My mouth is already watering.” She licks her lips.
I watch as her long yellow sundress falls against her legs.
She looks up at me, and right away, her smile fades. “Is everything okay?” she asks.
I nod with a tight smile, trying to hide the fact that, no, everything is not okay.
“You look very tired or worn out.” Her head tilts as she narrows her gaze at me. “Are you still doing this business all by yourself?”
I nod. Because what else am I going to say?
Oh, I think my husband doesn’t love me anymore.
He might be cheating on me, too.
This week has been hard, and I guess it shows. I’m too tired to put a fake smile on my face. I know I should since I’m the face of the business, but sometimes you just can’t. Even when you try to force it, it just won’t come.
It’s like I’ve been living in a different universe. A universe I never thought I would ever be in. Zay comes home late, doesn’t eat the dinner I make, and sleeps on the couch. We wake up in the morning and don’t say a word to each other. He goes on with his business and so do I.
Repeat.
I’ve thought about things to say to him, but I truthfully don’t even know what to say because I don’t know what to think.
Something has changed. It’s pointless asking him. Even if he gave me an answer, I don’t know if I would believe it.
“Honey, you’re going to run yourself into the ground if you don’t get help.”
“I’m fine.”
She looks me up and down with a questionable glance, not hiding how she feels. “We should set up an appointment with my husband and see what he thinks.”
I remember her telling me her husband helps with small businesses. Right now, I can barely even think straight, let alone think about opening up a bakery.
“Yeah. I’ll think about it.”
She crosses her arms. “There is no harm in talking to him and seeing what options you have.”
I swallow the lump in my throat, forcing the tears back, my chest tightening as the weight of it all presses down on me. I don’t want to cry. Not here. Not now. Especially not in front of her. I know she cares, but right now, I’m drowning in my own emotions. I’m so suffocated by my own thoughts, and I don’t have the energy to fight back Haley’s concerns.
I glance at her and I nod, forcing a bigger smile, hoping she doesn’t notice how broken I am right now. “Can you text me a day and time he’s available? I really have to get going.”
She nods and places a hand on my shoulder. Does she know there’s more to my appearance than she’s letting on? She seemsto not hold the truth in, but she hasn’t continued questioning me.
After walking out and saying our goodbyes. I rush to my car and let it all out, laying my head down on my steering wheel. I let the tears flow out. All the tears I held in since I smelled that perfume on Zayn’s shirt.
It’s Friday night, our date night, and I didn’t bother getting ready. We haven’t talked all week, so there is no hope of us going out. But all day, there was a slight hope that he would text me and tell me he wants to go out. Or hell, even tell me he wants to talk. I feel like I’m the one who did something bad, and I need to apologize to him about the way he’s acting. But why should I apologize, and why do I even want him to talk to me after how he’s been? My heart says one thing and my brain says another. Those two organs are in a tug-of-war that I don’t want to be a part of. But I am because they’re a part of me.
He’s been distant before, but this is on a whole other level. Even if he’s mad that I accused him of cheating, why can’t we at least talk about it? He accused me and Ezra of sleeping together and I didn’t treat him this way. Ezra didn’t even treat him like this. It doesn’t make sense.
Rya hasn’t talked to me much either, and I wonder if it’s because she and Ezra are doing better. I’ve been meaning to call her and tell her what’s been going on, but then I stop myself because she seems to be doing good after what she held in for so long. I don’t want to ruin the high she’s been on since then.
The sun has set now, and Zayn hasn’t made his appearance yet. Not surprised here. I slide into my sweats and an oversized hoodie, wrap myself up on the couch and turn onHow to Lose a Guy in 10 Days. It’s a classic movie I turn on when I need some comfort.
Hours later and Zayn still hasn’t come home. I’m still not surprised because of the way he’s been acting. I had a feeling he would go out with his friends. It hurts to know he didn’t let me know, even if we’re not on the best terms. It’s almost as if he has no respect for me anymore.
I scroll through Netflix again, trying to find something else to watch. By this time, I’d be fast asleep, but tonight it’s different. The anxiety is building inside me, and it won’t let me relax enough to drift off. It’s been like this all week. Even after Haley’s comment the other day, I realized how much it was affecting me. I don’t know why Zay not coming home is bothering me when I had the biggest feeling he wasn’t going to come home. I was let down by something I knew wouldn’t happen.
