“Stop it!” I shouted. Everyone froze. My heart raced. I took a deep, calming breath. This reaction wasn’t helping anything. “Just stop.”
They thought I was a mess. Last night was a slip up, sure, but I’d been dealing with everything just fine before that. So how could I convince them it wasn’t a problem? How could I convince them I had everything under control?
“I can prove I’m fine,” I said.
Cas shook his head. “You don’t need to prove anything. We just need to talk about what you’re going through.”
I looked him head on. “Fight me.”
His brow furrowed. “What?”
“Fight me,” I repeated. “Come on, I can prove I’m fine. Fight me, and if I win, we drop it and move on. If you win, fine, we can talk. If I wasn’t fine, I wouldn’t be able to fight, right?”
The logic made sense…if I thought about it hard enough. They were worried I would keep losing it, so what better test than to spar with one another? I could keep everything in check, show them that whatever memories surfaced wouldn’t make a difference in the long run. I didn’tneedto talk about it in order to accomplish our goals. We could move on, focus on the present, and leave the rest behind.
Cas’s jaw worked like he was considering it.
Ciel scoffed. “No. That’s ridiculous.”
I stared Cas down. “I promise I’m fine. Don’t you trust me?”
“Don’tyoutrustus?” Ryu snapped.
I ignored him.
“It’s not about trust, love,” Cas responded.
“Then fight me,” I urged. “Let’s go spar in the gym. Give me a chance to prove that I’m okay and what happened last night was not an issue.”
“No—” Ryu said.
“Fine,” Cas cut him off.
Obi frowned. “Caspian, this is not a good idea.”
“You’ll do it?” I asked.
“He will not,” Ryu said.
“Yes,” Cas answered.
I smirked. Cas and I had never actually sparred. I was definitely quick enough to out-maneuver him. When I did, it would show that I had everything under control.
Even if no one believed me, a deal was a deal.
“Come on then,” I said as I made my way to the elevator. Everyone followed.
“This is—This is obviously a bad idea,” Ciel said. “You guys can see that, right?”
“I think it’s a great idea.”
“No one asked you,” Ryu said. He turned to Cas. “Yes. Horrible idea. You can’t fight her.”
“Trust me,” Cas responded.
The door pinged open, and we circled around the mat in the middle of the gym. I bounced on the balls of my toes while stretching the muscles of my arms, neck, and back. I had this. Cas wouldn’t want to hurt me, so he’d be on the defensive. If I went aggressive, I could surprise him and knock him off his feet.
“I’m not happy about this,” Ryuji said while Cas did his own stretching.
