“That would be lovely,” she assured him, her voice hoarse from how her throat had tightened with emotion. It felt as if she were tumbling in waves of yearning that were likely to pull her under and drown her.
Behind them, voices floated up the stairs and the thudding of footsteps resounded in the silence. She welcomed the intrusion so she could regain control of herself.
“Come on,” Rhys said, releasing her and taking her hand. His much larger hand enveloped hers, and she concentrated on the way it made her feel as they walked to their room. She wanted to cherish each moment and imprint everything about it in her memory so she would have it when he was gone. She felt safe with him and seen in a way she never had before.
He opened the door and stepped back to allow her in first. She entered the small room and looked around. It was cozy, sparse but nicely decorated. The first thing she noticed was the plump, inviting bed with a dark coverlet. To the right of it was a window through which she could see the stars, the very stars Rhys had said they would look at together if he were to court her. She sighed and moved her gaze left past the hearth, which crackled with a fire that lit the room with a soft orange glow. A dark wooden writing desk and chair were beside the hearth, and beside that—
She sucked in a sharp breath, shocked to see a wooden tub with swirls of white mist rising from the water. She swiveled toward Rhys, who had been standing behind her silently. “However did ye manage a tub with warm water?”
“Coin,” he said with a grin and a wink. “I thought you might want to get clean. I know that bathing isn’t an everyday thing in this time. Still…” Candles flickered around the room, sending shadows and shafts of light dancing across his face and highlighting his uncertainty.
She burst into laughter. “People in this time want to be clean, too, Rhys. I grant ye a full-body bath is nae an everyday thing, but I personally believe it should be. It makes one feel so much better, and I think it leads to good health. Nae to mention it makes ye smell good, and yer hair feels better, and—Turn around, please!” she commanded, beside herself with gratitude and impatience to get into the tub.
He chuckled. “How about I sit on the bed and close my eyes? I’d rather not stand the whole time you’re in the tub. I’m well aware of how long a woman can take in a bath.”
She frowned as jealousy streaked through her, and she turned quickly from him, not wanting him to see how his words had affected her. Suddenly, he was behind her and his strong arms slid around her waist. He gave her a tight hug, which drew her solidly against him.
“Jealous?” he whispered, his warm breath wafting over the sensitive skin of her neck.
“Nay!” she protested, trying to wiggle out of his hold.
But instead of letting her go, he turned her to face him. The look of yearning he gave her stopped her wiggling. “I wish you were,” he said, his voice ragged, “but I also wish I didn’t want you to be. I have no right, given—”
He stopped abruptly, but she knew what he had not said. Given he would be returning to his time, he did not think he had the right to want her to be jealous of women he had known, seemingly intimately if he knew their bathing habits.
She could say nothing. She could let things go. She knew he would not push her. He was honorable and good, and she suspected she was falling in love with him. Or perhaps she’d already fallen. She could not live for whatmightbe. Maybe he’d stay. Maybe he’d court her. Maybe they’d find a way to be together, despite her obligations to her brother and sister. She wanted to live for herself right now, no matter the consequences. She would deal with those later.
She swallowed the hard lump of fear in her throat as she took his hand in hers and held his gaze. “I am jealous,” she whispered and was pleased to see her admission had the ability to shock him.
His eyes widened, and then a slow smile spread across his exquisite face. “I’d be a liar if I said I wasn’t glad,” he said, taking her other hand so that they stood face-to-face, hands locked together just as surely as their souls were locked in this moment.
She knew it was the truth. He could have given her pretty words and vows to woo her to his bed. She’d heard such tales from the women at Court, as well as the women at her castle. She knew men could be wicked. Yet, Rhys had told her the blunt truth, that he’d go back to his time if he could because he needed to.
She took his hand and set it above her heart, then placed her hand over his. She pressed his palm flat against her chest so he could feel her pounding heart. “Tonight,” she said, “let us pretend ye will be here with me in this time forever. Let us pretend we are wed.”
He frowned, which was not at all the reaction she’d been hoping for, and embarrassment sent a flush through her. She turned her head, tugged at her hand, and mumbled, “Forget my foolish words.”
Why had she thought he would ever wish to wed her?
“No,” he replied, holding tight to one hand while firmly capturing her chin with the other. He guided her face to look at him. His gaze burned into hers, making her feel suddenly feverish. “I’ll never forget what you just said to me.” His words vibrated with intensity. “It will be imprinted in my mind for the rest of my life, Maggie. The frown was for concern for you, not lack of desire. I want you so much it terrifies me.”
“Oh,” she said, unable to say more under the deluge of feelings. After a long moment, she got ahold of herself and offered him a tentative smile. “That makes me feel better than yer fierce frown.”
He drew her into his embrace, his arms wrapping tightly around her, his heat surrounding her. “As much as I know I’ll regret this to my dying day, I can’t allow you to give yourself to me. I know what virginity—innocence—means in your time and how it could ruin any chance of you wedding another.”
“I do nae think I’ll ever wish to wed another.”
“God, Maggie. You’re killing me. I only have so much self-control, and it wants to snap.”
She grinned, getting the meaning of what he was saying if not completely understanding every word he had used to say it. “Then let’s lose control together,” she said, using his words.
“And what if you got pregnant tonight?”
She raised her eyebrows in question.
“With child,” he clarified.
“Oh,” she muttered. His question had reduced her to answering like a simpleton.
