“Makes sense though,” Ben says.
“How could that possibly make sense?”
“Because she’s his person. Right?” Jordan looks at me.
I nod at him. “She is. I thought I needed space from her tonight to work this through and maybe I did a little, but I need her. It doesn’t feel right talking about my future—even whathappens in the next couple of weeks—without talking to her first.”
Even the thought of sitting down next to her and having this conversation has all my angst and nerves quieting. As long as I have her, I can get through anything.
Ben lifts his beer bottle in a toast. “You know, you’re not at all who I pictured whenever I thought about who my sister would end up with, but I’m really glad it’s you.”
“Same,” Jordan says. “Some of those guys she used to bring around?” He shudders dramatically. “None of them would ever sit around on a weeknight and eat tacos and french fries, that’s for damn sure.”
“Yeah, I’m going to need details about those guys,” I say, realizing for the first time that we never really had thewho did you used to dateconversation beyond Julie telling me that they sucked in bed, leaving me feeling superior because I unequivocallydo notsuck in bed.
“Fuck no,” Jordan and Jeremy say at the same time.
“You think I want to incur Julie Parker’s wrath for spilling her dating history to you?” Jordan shakes his head. “You want to know, you ask her yourself.”
“You know what, I don’t even want to know. It doesn’t matter. I’ve got her now.”
“You sure do,” Ben says. “I’ve never seen her with anyone the way she is with you. She’s happier. Lighter. There’s no one who deserves that more than Julie.”
I’m not sure how a conversation about the abrupt end to my football career turned into this, but I’m feeling a little better so I’m willing to roll with it.
“I’ll be good to her. No one will ever love her the way I do. She’s safe with me. She’s my whole fucking world.”
Ben tosses me a beer, which I catch one-handed. “Well then welcome to the family, brother. Happy to have you.”
“I wasn’t going to say this tonight because tonight is for wallowing, not decision making. And that whole one step at a time thing. But when you’re ready to decide on what to do next, consider working with me.” Jeremy has an earnest look I’m not used to seeing on the cocky, confident former hockey player.
“I’m already working with you.”
“In the offseason, sure. But…” Jeremy stops abruptly, probably realizing what he was about to say. “Fuck, sorry. I shouldn’t have brought it up. We can talk about it another time.”
“No, it’s fine.” I realize it is fine. Or, maybe not fine, but at least, in this moment, not gut wrenchingly terrible. “You can say it.”
“You sure?”
“I’m not sure about anything, but I won’t fall apart, if that’s what you’re asking.”
“You could fall apart, you know,” Jeremy says.
“I might. Probably will. But not right now.” I can only think of one person I want to fall apart in front of, and she isn’t in this room.
“Good enough. Well, if you find yourself in a position where you’re looking for something to do full time, come work with me at the foundation. Emma keeps telling me I can’t run the sports camps solo. She says I need a full-time program director, and she’s usually right about this kind of thing.”
“Usually?” Jordan smirks at Jeremy.
“Always, dude. She keeps your ass in line.” Ben leans back in his chair and kicks his feet out in front of him.
“I fucking wish,” Jeremy mutters.
Jordan tosses a beer cap that hits Jeremy square in the chest. “If you’re not planning on sharing with the class, you should probably stop muttering like that. It’s making you look pathetic.”
“Fuck off. I’m talking to Asher now.” He turns to me, his face serious. “It’s simple, really. I need someone to run the sports camps full-time. With all my other responsibilities at the foundation and at the bar, I can’t give them the time and attention they deserve, and there’s no one I trust to run them more than you. You’re incredible with kids, and you have a really good head for this work. There’s no rush; I’m not filling the position until you tell me you definitely don’t want it. Take all the time you need.”
I consider what he said, and my first thought is standing on a frozen high school football field in Boulder teaching a freshman third string quarterback a new way to throw a football and the smile that lit up his face when he finally got it. I don’t hate the idea.
