She smirked, that same smug tilt of her lips that had me ready to choke her and kiss her all at once like I used to do back in the day. “Donovan was a mistake, and you know that. I thought I could move on, and run from… what happened to the both of us, but I can’t. You’re the one I’ve always loved, Pressure. You know why I left. You’re acting like I had a choice, but you refuse to acknowledge that. You’ve erased that shit so much out of your mind that you just act like it never existed.”
My head snapped toward her, my jaw lockin’ as I fought the heat risin’ up inside. She said that shit so easy, like the weight of her leavin’ and losin’ what meant everything to me, thenignorin’ me afterward was light. “Don’t come in here throwin’ the L word around like it still mean somethin’. If you loved me, you wouldn’t have bounced when shit got hard. You would’ve understood I needed yo’ ass when we was both goin’ through it. You wouldn’t have let me think you was happy with that clown ass nigga while I was losin’ my mind.”
The elevator dinged, breakin’ the tension for a second as the doors slid open. I stepped out, my pace steady toward my room. I could hear her heels followin’ me, but her silence louder than words. I didn’t stop her, but I didn’t welcome her either.
When I reached my room, I pushed the door open, lettin’ it swing wide as I walked inside. Before I could turn around to tell her to back the fuck off, she slipped in behind me and closed the door. That soft click felt heavier than a slam.
She leaned against the door, her eyes locked on me like she was studyin’ me, and learnin’ me all over again. “I thought I was done,” she admitted, her voice low. “But I miss you. And yes, I lied. When I saw that you were looking for a wife, I couldn’t bear the thought of you marrying someone and giving them what we lost. I realized no matter how far I ran from you or the pain, nobody else could reach me the way you do. I love you, Pressure, and I wanna try again.”
Her words slid into my chest like daggers. Part of me wanted to laugh in her face, but another part wanted to fold and let her sink right back into me. I hated that I even felt that pull. I rubbed my hand over my head, lettin’ out a sharp sigh. “Girl, just ‘cause you figured out your nigga was weak don’t mean you can run back here like I’m supposed to catch you. You made your choice.”
She pushed off the door and walked slow toward me, each step feelin’ like she was breakin’ me down without even touchin’ me. Her eyes stayed locked on mine. The shit was intense like she was waitin’ for me to blink first. “I don’t care about choicesanymore. I care about us. I’m askin’ you to let me stay in this house and compete like the others. Let me prove to you that I’m the only one who really knows you.”
I chuckled under my breath, but it wasn’t amused. “You crazy as hell. You think I’m about to put you in the same category as them? You think this shit fair to the women who been fightin’ for my time while you was hidin’ behind another nigga? Yeah… a’ight.”
She kept comin’, her body close enough now that I could smell that faint vanilla scent she always wore, the one that used to drive me wild. I told myself not to let it get to me, but my chest felt even tighter.
When she finally stepped close enough to reach for me, I moved back. My feet shifted because my mind screamed at me to keep my distance. But my heart? That shit fluttered, and I ain’t appreciate it. She caught my hesitation and smiled like she already knew she had me halfway beat. She slipped around me with a grace that was too damn familiar and wrapped her arms around my frame before I could sidestep again.
I stood stiff, my body fightin’ my mind, but her hands rested against my back and then slid up to the front, tuggin’ lightly at my beard. She tilted her head, her eyes pullin’ me in like she had the right to still claim me. “You look even better now than you did before,” she whispered, her tone smooth and certain.
I sighed hard, shakin’ my head. I wanted to be unmoved, and I forced my face to stay cold, but inside I felt that shit. I hated that I felt it, but it was there.
She rose up on her toes and pressed a soft kiss against my lips. It was just enough to remind me what her mouth felt like. “Give us one more try,” she murmured. “If you don’t feel like I’m the better woman out of all of them, then I’ll leave your life for good and never look back. Is that what you really want?”
Her eyes stayed locked on mine, seductive but soft, daring me to answer.
I stared back, my chest heavy, my mind loud and my heart betrayin’ me. But my lips never moved. I didn’t answer her, ‘cause the truth was I ain’t know what the fuck to do.
“What the fuck you mean she won’t leave?” Kay’Lo asked.
Starin’ straight ahead, I hit the God Smoke a few times, watched the smoke swirl in the air and then let out a sigh. Dominoes clinked on the glass table between us. The room smelled like weed, cognac, and all the bullshit I couldn’t shake.
“I’m sayin’,” I muttered, flickin’ ash off the end of the blunt, “she done unpacked her shit already, and got a whole room like she payin’ rent in this bitch. Maids tell me she asked for extra towels and all that, like she really part of this shit now.”
Renza leaned back in his chair, smirkin’. He had his red cup tilted in his hand, and that low laugh he do when he see right through a nigga slid out. “Boy, you cappin’ if you act like you ain’t know this was gon’ happen. Ka’mari bold. She ain’t the type to knock on the door, wait for you to answer, then leave when you say so. If she came here, it’s ‘cause she know you gon’ let her rock.”
“That’s cap,” I shot back quick, slammin’ my domino down harder than I needed to. “She wrong as hell for showin’ up, and she gon’ see I ain’t the one playin’ wit’ her. This ain’t her place. She know that.”
Blaqson let out a short chuckle, lookin’ down at his hand full of bones. “Nigga, you sound like you tryna convince yourself.”
Kay’Lo leaned forward on his elbows. “Look cuz, if you really wanted her out, you would’ve had them guards walk her ass rightback down that driveway the same second she stepped foot in here. No hesitation. But you didn’t. You let her slide, and now she settin’ up shop like it’s a reunion tour.”
I looked at him and shook my head. “Man, get the fuck outta here.”
“Nah, he right,” Renza added, still smirkin’. “You coulda had her outta here before her heels touched the foyer. But you didn’t. So don’t sit up here actin’ like you don’t feel nothin’. We all know you, nigga. You ain’t never let nobody get away with disrespectin’ you or crossin’ you. If she still here, it’s ‘cause you still got somethin’ for her.”
The room went quiet except for the sound of dominoes slidin’ against the table and the bass from the Bluetooth speaker hummin’ low in the background. I dragged on the blunt, my chest heavy as I blew the smoke out slow. I wasn’t about to sit here and confess shit to these niggas, even if they was right. Ka’mari had a way of stirrin’ up old feelings, but I wasn’t about to give her that kind of power out loud.
“Man, change the subject,” I muttered, tossin’ another domino down.
Renza laughed, shakin’ his head. “Nigga, you weak when it come to her, and you know it.” He leaned back again, his eyes cuttin’ at me sharp. “Fuck it then, let’s talk about somethin’ else. Tell me this though… between Kashmere and Pluto, who was you really gon’ send home today?”
My jaw clenched, but I didn’t answer right away. Kay’Lo looked at me like he already knew the answer, Blaqson just watched and sipped from his cup.
“I don’t know,” I finally admitted. “Real shit, I don’t. Kash been wildin’, actin’ like she runnin’ me already, and Pluto… Pluto won’t even talk to me right now. She act like I’m the villain, like she don’t know what the fuck I’m carryin’ on my back.”
“Pluto cool though,” Kay’Lo said. “She lowkey. She not gon’ put your business out there or be all loud. Kash? She gon’ argue with you every other day, then fuck you after. It’s messy. Pluto might make you work for it, but she real.”
