He tilted his head. ‘The accents, eh? What do you think of mine?’
Her stomach flipped.It’s like melted chocolate and sends my insides to jelly. ‘It’s not bad,’ she lied.
He raised his eyebrows and laughed. ‘Not bad? Gee thanks. I bet you wouldn’t say that if I looked like Gerard Butler or James McAvoy,’ he teased.
She was trying to decide how to respond without giving herself away when the acoustic guitar of Lewis Capaldi’s ‘Hold Me While You Wait’ began to play.
Reid closed his eyes and leaned his head back briefly. ‘Oh God, this song. It gets me here,’ he said, placing his hand over his heart. ‘Every single bloody time. I get goosebumps. It’s like he’s had an insight into my soul. Like he read my thoughts and wrote them down.’ He shook his head.
Juliette wanted to say so much but wasn’t sure how to put things into words. ‘Mine too. He expresses how hard it can be to overcome the fear of not being enough, don’t you think? And that when you do give your heart away, especially if it’s been broken before, you open yourself up to getting hurt again. It’s terrifying.’ She sighed deeply and closed her eyes, hoping Reid was reading between the lines and understood what she was trying to express. ‘Finding out that your feelings aren’t returned must be such a heart-breaking thing to experience. Maybe it’s better not to know? Not to take the chance.’
He swallowed and nodded. ‘Aye, maybe. But maybe sometimes it’s a chance worth taking?’
They sat quietly again for a few moments as the song played, and Mr Capaldi sang about the agony of unrequited love and the pain of feeling insignificant and alone.
Eventually, Reid stood and peered down at her. ‘It’s a bit different to a ceilidh but… would you like to dance?’
Juliette glanced at his attire, then back up to his face and smiled. ‘You’re wearing atowel.’
He shrugged and held out his hand. ‘I’m game, if you are.’
She put her hand in his and let him pull her to her feet. She felt a little silly at the prospect of slow-dancing in a living room with a man dressed only in a bath sheet and a giggle escaped.
Reid took another step and slipped his arm around her waist. Suddenly, their amusing situation wasn’t quite so funny any more. The lyrics took on a whole new meaning as they moved together, slowly and in sync in the confined space. She rested her head on his bare chest, his heartbeat thumped a steady, hypnotic rhythm against her cheek, and he placed a tender kiss on the top of her head.
She lifted her face to make eye contact with him and there was a pleading look in his eyes. He wanted to speak but was holding back as the music floated around them, enveloping them in warmth and melancholy.
A line appeared between his brows and he chewed his lower lip; sure signs of conflict. ‘I… I know I said things about the timing, and I know you’re leaving soon, but…’ He swallowed nervously. ‘I’d like to know how it feels to kiss you properly, at least once before you go. And to have you kiss me back. And I’d like to just forget about all the stuff that’s happened today; to feel something good rather than utter uselessness and despair.’
Without breaking eye contact, Juliette slipped her hand around the back of his head and into the strands of hair at the nape of his neck.
Taking this as an invitation, Reid lowered his face until his lips gently touched hers as they swayed. She felt his heart rate increase as hers did the same and she closed her eyes. He deepened the kiss. His hand found her hair, and the arm around her waist tightened, pulling her closer still. She smoothed her hand around his shoulder and held him.
His lips were soft yet demanding; new, yet somehow strangely familiar. Shivers travelled the length of her spine as her desire for him grew. It had been so long since she had been held like this. She’d thought she’d make it through life never craving such a feeling again, but now she realised she was wrong.
Reid moved his mouth from her lips to her neck and back again; the towel was doing little to mask his own desire. ‘God, I want you so much,’ he whispered.
She responded breathlessly, ‘I want you too.’
The expression on his face, when he pulled away, told her that she’d surprised him with her admission. Before he could say anything, she took his hand and led him to the stairs, where he kissed her again, passionately, deeply. They walked silently up to the bedroom, leaving the music behind. Juliette was completely lost now to the need deep inside her, and the way Reid followed willingly as she pushed open her bedroom door made her forget everything but the two of them.
Once inside, she stretched up and removed her top, slipped down her skirt and stood before him in just her underwear. She should have been nervous, embarrassed even, but the way he looked at her, the longing in his eyes, gave her a confidence she thought she’d lost; she left behind her inhibitions and let him devour her with his gaze. It was empowering to let herself justbe; to give herself over to her desires.
He touched her cheek. ‘You’re so beautiful,’ he whispered. ‘But are you sure you want to do this?’
Her chest heaved, but it was lust rather than anxiety. ‘I’m sure. I want to feel all the things I’ve been missing. I want to feel wanted again.’
He stepped towards her and traced his fingertips along her collarbone and down the curve of each breast, causing her breath to hitch and her pulse to quicken.
‘You’re definitely wanted, Jules,’ he told her, before pulling her into his arms and connecting their lips once more. This time his tongue entered her mouth and she moaned at the feeling of his hands touching her. She allowed her hands to roam his body too and revelled in the way she felt shivers as she stroked her fingertips down the planes of his chest. She let go, giving in to desire, and with one swift move, Reid’s towel was discarded and they tumbled onto the bed in each other’s arms.
36
When Juliette awoke, she found herself alone. She held her breath and listened in the hope that Reid was possibly in the kitchen making coffee. But the place was silent. She scanned the pillow and bedside table for a note, but there was nothing. Had he just left without a goodbye? Surely not.
She stretched and climbed, in her state of nudity, from the bed. Thoughts of the previous night interrupted her, and she paused for a moment, allowing herself to remember the feeling of Reid’s weight on top of her and the way he kissed a path between her breasts down to her navel. She tried not to melt as she remembered the intimate connection of their naked bodies and the way he sent shocks of pleasure racing through every fibre of her being. She hated that she wished he’d stayed so they could experience it all over again. And she hated that she was upset with him for simply leaving.
But the thing she hated most of all was that, when she had looked up into his eyes, there had been something more there; something more powerful than lust and desire and need; something that outshone the way he made her insides quiver with the ecstatic joy of climax. And she felt it too, right down to her soul. She couldn’t call it love, but it was a deep bond, perhaps borne out of their commonalities. But whatever it was, it had left its mark on her heart and now she was going away and would have to forget about it; move forward and get on with her life.
