“You’ve got this, Sawyer,” I murmured to the woman in the mirror. “It’s almost over.”
I leaned closer to my reflection, searching for the strength I knew was somewhere in there. The same strength that got me through law school on caffeine and two hours of sleep. The same grit that let me stand up in courtrooms packed with seasoned lawyers who looked at me like I was just some kid playing dress-up.
Feelings don’t run the show. You do.
It was easier said than done, sure. But wasn’t everything? How foolish was I to even consider that we’d be able to have an ending that resembled a happily ever after? Good wood or not, he was an escaped felon, after all. We were always meant to have an expiration date.
Don’t let good dick fuck up your life, Sawyer. This was never supposed to be a forever thing.
After cleaning my face and freshening up, I walked outside to my car. Kareem was leaning against the driver’s side door, waiting for me.
“So, I guess this is it, huh?” I asked when I approached him.
That was the million-dollar question. Every time I looked at him, every word we shared just seemed to chip away at the wall I’d built around myself. And now, after touching him again, the dam was cracking, threatening to flood me with all these feelings I was supposed to be holding back.
“I guess it is,” he responded.
“Kareem,” I breathed out, barely recognizing my own voice, thick with desire. Every time I said his name, it felt like a key unlocking something primal within me.
He responded without words, his hands growing bolder as they sketched the outline of my hips, drawing me closeruntil there was no space left between us. My body responded instinctively, pressing into his firm chest. The hard lines of his physique contrasted with the softness of my own, yet they fit together as though molded from the same clay.
“I gotchu something.” Kareem stepped back before digging his hand in his pocket and retrieving a wad of cash. “Take it. It’s to fix your patio door in case your landlord gives you shit about not wanting to take care of it or something.”
A slight smile lifted one corner of my mouth. “Wow. I was planning on telling him it was damage from the storm, or use my renter’s insurance. But thank you. I didn’t expect this.”
“Use it for whatever you need. It’s yours now,” he insisted before placing the money in my palm and closing my fingertips over it.
I glanced up, and our eyes locked. There wasn’t any need for words. The air between us was thick with all the things we didn’t say. I reached out and laid my hand gently on his arm. It was a simple touch, but it was all I had to offer. I wasn’t ready to say goodbye.
Kadeem’s gaze drilled into mine, those brown orbs swimming with a sadness that seemed to reach out and wrap around my chest. For a second, we just stood there, me with my hand on his arm, him looking like he was about to say or do something we’d probably both regret.
My eyelids fluttered shut for a moment, and I felt his body lean into my touch ever so slightly. There was comfort there, but underneath it all, a spark of something more dangerous, something more enticing. It was buried under layers of fear and uncertainty, but the desire we both fought to keep at bay for reasons we didn’t have to say out loud was there, nonetheless.
I leaned in, and our lips met, crashing together in a kiss charged with pent-up emotions. It wasn’t soft or tentative. It was the kind of kiss that said all the things we hadn’t dared tospeak since our paths had crossed, the kind that spoke of hidden yearnings for something more than just sex.
“What's on your mind?” he inquired once we finally pulled away.
I rolled my eyes. “There you go trying to analyze me again.”
Since I’d known Kareem he’d been reading my mind like it was that easy to see through to my thoughts.I couldn’t help but wonder if his mind was playing the same games as mine.
“It’s not my fault I can read you like a book. Now tell me.”
I sighed. “It’s nothing. It’s silly. It’s stupid.”
“Tell me, Sawyer,” he demanded.
“Okay, okay. I was just wondering if things were different between us and we’d met under different circumstances, what our first date would be like.”
He arched a curious brow. “Our first date?”
“See! I told you it was stupid,” I replied, feeling my insecurities taking over. “I don’t even know why the thought crossed my mind.”
“That's not stupid. Maybe impossible, but not stupid.”
“Yeah?"
“I've never been on a real date before,” he admitted. “But I’d go all out for you.”
