I still stayed calm as a single shot rang through the air.
Calmer still as pain exploded in my flesh. Screams erupted in the room, and everything went dark.
The bullet from a rifle pierced my body and I smiled like the fucking villain I always told Lincoln I could be.
As I looked exactly like my father and died like him too.
The End.
Just Kidding…
Chapter Twenty Three
The moon hung low over the docks, casting jagged streaks of silver across the water that I watched through my bedroom window purely out of boredom. It was too quiet out there, too still for what I was feeling inside. Even the rats and the dead had stopped bothering me, content to let me wallow in my bullshit mood.
Assholes.The lot of them.
Every breath I took scraped against my ribs, the painkillers I’d been swallowing all day not doing enough to take the more than the edge off the pain. I wanted a whiskey. A bottle of it. Or a bullet in my head. Either would work to stop the dull throbbing of my injuries and the stupid thoughts inside my head.
I’d protected Ruby. Of all the strange things I’d done in my life, that had been the oddest. A cabin exploding was strange – not so much, when you considered it was definitely an O’Malleyowned place and they were fond of their bombs – but me playing hero? Unfathomable.
I’d done it though. I’d tackled her to the ground, shielded her with my body.
I’d bled for her…
I was clearly broken. There was no other explanation.
I swallowed a groan as I shifted in bed, the ache in my side spreading like wildfire. Each movement sent a fresh wave of pain slicing through my body, but it wasn’t the kind of pain that concerned me. I could handle physical pain. I’d been handling it my whole life.
It was the helplessness that was clawing at me.
Silver sheets tangled around me, slick against my skin as I lay in my too-large bed, alternating between staring at the ceiling and the water outside, wondering how the hell I’d ended up like this. Weak. Trapped. Useless. Unable to go to Sapphire’s engagement party, even if it was sort of just for a trap.
I wanted to be there. For safety, sure. But also because she was engaged, and I wanted to celebrate.
I wanted to make sure she knew I was happy that she was happy and that if any of those boys broke her heart, I’d gut them so fast they didn’t even have time to beg me to spare their life.
I clenched my teeth so hard I could hear my molars grind together. I was lying here like some broken-down bastard, licking my wounds, but I should’ve been there. I should’ve been standing next to her, making sure everything went smoothly.
Making sure she was safe.
I dragged a hand over my face, my fingers brushing the stubble that had grown in too thick since I hadn’t shaved in days. The apartment was too quiet. Too still. Usually, that’s how I liked it. Neat, clean, organized. I didn’t do chaos, not unless it was on my terms.
Now I could barely walk without moaning and having everything inside me protest.
Rika and Aiden were out. Rika had gone to the party. Aiden had gone to the store to buy me some snacks to ‘stop me from sulking’ and he’d probably come back soon, with bags of sweet treats and bullshit, to try and keep me entertained. As if I needed anything other than a bottle of whiskey and a pack of smokes. But without him here, or Rika’s incessant talking, it was silent.
But the apartment wasn’t empty.
Ruby was still here.
The thought of her, just a few rooms away, watching movies on my couch, gnawed at me in ways I wasn’t proud of. She was Aiden’s girl. Sweet when she wanted to be, I guessed, but mostly a pain in my ass.
She wasn’t mine. I wasn’t supposed to want her, and I sure as hell wasn’t supposed to care. She was a woman, and I didn’t allow myself to like them.
But Idid.
I fucking liked her. Wanted her near me. I almost called out to her, even to pretend to need something, just so she would sit near me and talk.
