“Ido believe that this Season you have been more melancholy than I have ever seen you.”
Adam snorted.
“Except I only came to LondonlastSeason,” he reminded him, making his friend scowl.
“That is not what I meant. You and I have been friends for many a year. For whatever reason, you have gone from contentment, free from the shadows of Lady Margaret, only to plunge into an evengreaterdarkness. You must tell me why. It is the only way to loosen your burden a little.”
“Ah… I…”
“It is Miss Millington.” Lord Campbell was the one to speak then, rather than allowing Adam any opportunity to answer the question himself. When Adam opened his mouth again to protest, Lord Campbell only chuckled. “Come now, do not fuss. I am correct, am I not?”
Adam shifted in his chair, wanting to shrug, wanting to refuse to say that yes, it was she who would not leave his thoughts but, aware he could not bring himself to lie, he said nothing.
“Why do you pretend that you do not care for her?” Lord Dennington stretched himself out in the sunshine, like an overly large cat, his feet stuck out in front of him, crossed at the ankle. “You find her delightful, do you not?”
Adam sighed loudly.
“If that is what you wish me to say, then I shall confess it. Yes, I find Miss Millington interesting and excellent company.”
“And?”
Closing his eyes, Adam let out a hiss of breath between clenched teeth.
“And I cannot help but think of her. You will find this ridiculous I am sure, but that is the state of things.”
“If you believe that we already are aware of your interest in the lady, then why do you wish to hide it from us?”
Adam flung up his hands, narrowly avoiding his drink on the edge of the table as he answered Lord Campbell’s question.
“I cannotallowmyself to feel anything for anyone! I have already had my heart broken by one young lady, and I believe now that any such affection is foolishness. It does not bring contentment or happiness. It fades quickly and burns up easily. That way lies only pain.” Why was it that, as he said it, his heart no longer believed the words which his lips spoke, any longer, not now that Miss Millington had stepped away from him. He found himself suddenly desperate for her company and let his head drop forward. “It would be idiocy to allow myself to feel such things again.”
This last sentence came out in a mumble, as his eyes squeezed closed.
“I hardly think you would be.” Lord Dennington replied, calmly. “Surely you can see now that there is more to love than what you felt for Lady Margaret?”
Adam hesitated.
“Perhaps.”
“What you feel for Miss Millington,thatis more like genuine affection,” Lord Campbell interjected, “for not only is she someone worthy of your attentions, but I have no doubt that she returns them also.” At this, Adam could say nothing, his mouth falling a little ajar as he looked back at Lord Campbell, silently thinking that he had offered the most ridiculous suggestion. Chuckling, Lord Campbell simply lifted both hands. “Come now, tell me that you have seen how she looks up at you? How her gaze lingers and how she smiles so brightly?”
Gathering himself a little, Adam frowned.
“She is behaving just as every other young lady does.”
“I should disagree with you on that.” Lord Dennington laughed as Adam’s frown only grew. “You may not be thrilled with us saying such things, but that is the truth of it - and we tell you this for one reason only.” The smile left his face as he leaned forward, his elbow on the table, one finger pointing towards Adam. “It is so that you not do not miss out on what so many other gentlemen seek.”
“Which is?”
Folding his arms across his chest, Adam waited as Lord Dennington and Lord Campbell looked at each other.
“They seek love.”
Lord Campbell spoke quietly but it was the slight catch in his voice that gave Adam pause. What they were both saying to him was not something he could simply ignore. Lord Campbell was speaking as a man who had found himself in such a position and had been gravely disappointed.
He lowered his head.
“If I admit to feeling anything for the lady then…”
