This only confirms that Rhys won't be coming back and that he hasn't missed me the way I've missed him. He never signs a note without the word “love” by his name. It felt like it came from an estranged roommate, not someone I was engaged to only two weeks ago.
I sit in my car in the parking lot of the university, still trying to digest everything that happened in the last hour. I don't know how I got here. How I went from having the world at my feet to being completely lost. I stare out the window, not ready to move yet, and I'm starting to think I’m too numb to ever move again, until I spot a familiar blond walking across the parking lot in white jeans and a checkered, cut-off sweater.
Seeing Taylor saunter toward the sidewalk is all I need to hurry out of my car. I don't even realize I'm running at first. “Taylor, wait,” I say, wondering if he got my email this morning.
Him not turning around forces me to pick up my pace until I'm able to reach out and touch his shoulder. His bright blue eyes are wide and full of surprise when he finally faces me—that's when I realize he has ear buds in. “Professor?”
Even though I know that’s what he should call me, I still can't help but feel bothered by how formal it sounds coming out of his mouth. He pulls out his white ear buds. “Can I help you? Pretty sure I don't have your class today.”
I shake my head, still panting from running after him, trying to catch my breath. “No, you're right, you don't. Did you get my email this morning?”
His gaze falls to the floor, and he shifts where he stands, lifting his backpack higher on his shoulders. “I um...yeah...I just haven't had a chance to respond yet. What did you want to talk about?”
“If you have time, perhaps you can talk with me in my office.”
“Or we can talk here.”
“Okay.” I look around, taking notice of the people passing us, and relax my shoulders when they walk by without giving us a single glance. “Here is fine. I want to know why you're dropping my class. I hope I didn't upset you in some way.”
He swallows hard, and his conflicted eyes finally meet mine. “I just assumed that's what you wanted. I didn't think...I didn't know if it would be better if I just dropped the class. You seemed pretty bothered by me being there yesterday.”
I didn't think I could feel worse than I already did, but my chest only squeezes tighter. I only came off cold because I didn't trust myself to be around him alone for too long. It led me to do everything I could to leave a situation that would cost me my job. “No, Taylor. I think you misunderstood. That's not what I want at all. You clearly need to be in this class and neither of us could have known this would happen. Please don't drop because you're worried about me. I would really like it if you stayed.”
He sighs. “Are you sure?”
I nod, squeezing his shoulder, not ready to remove my hand from his body. “I'm sure. So, I hope to see you in class on Tuesday.”
He smiles hesitantly, not shifting away from my touch. If anything, he becomes more at ease and his reaction causes a flutter in my stomach. “Yeah, I guess so. See you next week, Professor.”
He places his ear buds back in his ears and continues to walk towards his class, and I have to stop myself from following him.
This is going to be a very long semester indeed.
10
Taylor
I can't stop thinkingabout yesterday when I ran into Jamie in the parking lot. I was at a loss for words at first. I got his email an hour before and planned on ignoring it and sending the request again and again until he approved it. I started to change my mind after the way he was looking at me. His eyes were begging and pleading when he asked me not to leave his class. It was probably guilt driven and nothing more.
I told myself I would at least try to stick it out. He was right, I did need that class, and even though he did upset me, I couldn't tell him that. So instead, like an idiot, I only told him what I thought he wanted to hear and now I can't forget about the way his face lit up at my words. Loud honking snaps me out of my thoughts and a man sticks his head out the window. “You going to cross or not?”
I nod and walk quickly across the intersection, wrapping my jacket tightly around my shaking body. It's freezing out tonight and I hate being downtown on a Saturday; I can't stand being around more drunks than I already have to be during my shifts at work. I worked the earlier shift today and I wanted so badly to get Jamie out of my head that I agreed to meet some guy from a dating app for drinks at a bar. His name is Chad, and all the pictures he sent were of him shirtless at a gym or him lying on his bed holding his cock. The guy is the true definition of douchebag and I nearly turn around when I see him through the glass door flirting with some twink. His hand is pressed to his lower back and he’s whispering something into the twink’s ear.
I roll my eyes and take a deep breath. It’s not like I have to marry this guy or even have a conversation with him, but it would be nice if he at least waited until we sat down and had a few drinks together before trying to fuck someone else. I sure do know how to pick them. First, I go after an emotionally and professionally unavailable guy, and now this jerk.
I pull open the door. The song playing is by some angry rock band. It fits the mood in the bar and the crowd of people—except for the guy I’m here to meet. He’s wearing a pair of khakis, brown loafers, and a black polo with the collar popped up. Chad sticks out like a sore thumb and I’m not sure, but he appears to be oblivious to it. He looks up and smiles my way, walking away from the redhead he was just pressed up against, and I can’t help but sneer. “I guess you got started without me, huh? I wasn’t aware I was that late.”
He laughs, grabbing two shots from the bartender and strutting my way. “Relax sexy, I got here a bit early to make sure I beat traffic and was only talking. I’d much rather do more than that with you though.” He licks his lips, eyeing me up and down. “Man, you’re a lot hotter in person. I was worried you were one of those guys who only posts his good pictures or ones of himself from twenty years ago. Trust me, I’ve had it happen a few times.”
He hands me the shot. I immediately drink it, enjoying the slight burn in my throat, and he throws his back right after me. “Look at you,” he says. “I sure hope you aren’t some lightweight. I don’t want to take you home with me too drunk.”
“How about we find somewhere to sit and maybe order some horrible bar food before we start discussing me going home with you? By the looks of it, if I were to have come any later, you would have left with that guy.” I nod my head toward the redhead who can’t stop glancing our way with jealousy filling his eyes. When we take a seat in a booth in the back, Chad opens his menu and points at the wing basket. “Want to share? I’m not too hungry. I ate a bit before I came here.”
I shrug. “I’m not that hungry either honestly, I just don’t want to drink on an empty stomach, and I feel weird just sitting here without food or a drink in my hand...”
He stands up from the table, giving me his best toothy smile. “Let me solve that problem for you. Don’t worry, sexy, I’ll take good care of you tonight, in more ways than one.”
I swallow the bile rising up my throat to keep from gagging. Literally any guy at the bar tonight would probably be better thanDawson’s Creekover here. He runs a hand through his perfect dirty blond hair, walking toward the bar with the menu in his hand.
