“Know what?” he growls. “What the hell else don’t I know?”
I shake my head some more. Not really hearing him or seeing him. Not even talking to him, but more to myself. “She said she would tell you, but you wouldn’t care. I thought when I still didn’t hear fromyou,she was right. That was the last time I tried.”
“She who? What the hell are you talking about?”
“Your mom,” I choke.
“Excuse me?” He stands up straight. His white-knuckled grip on the chair releases and he’s stalking toward me again. “When the fuck did you see her again?”
“Two years ago. I needed you. I needed to know you’d be there for Tyler.” My head falls as I prepare to tell him. The diagnosis isn’t an easy one to hear. It’s not even easy for me to say. The only people I’ve ever told were my parents and his mother.
“Why would Ineedto be there for Tyler?” he asks. When I don’t say anything right away, he grips my chin tilting my head up. His eyes have morphed and changed. No longer does that fiery fury blaze. Instead, all I see is worry, concern, and fear. “What did you tell her?”
“I — I’m sick, Ryder.”
Utter disbelief filters through the air. Denial. I can see it on him. He’s not going to handle this well. “What do you mean you’re sick? You look fine.”
“I am today. I will be, most days. When I first found out, I panicked and ran straight from the doctor to your apartment. Or I thought it was yours. I was—I was overwhelmed. It was hard to hear.”
“You need to cut through the bullshit, Heaven. Tell me what’s wrong with you.” His voice is panicked and his grip on me is getting harder. I can’t drag this out with all the details. It won’t lessen the blow anyway.
“I have MS, Ryder. When I found out, it scared me. I thought it meant I wouldn’t be here for Tyler, but chances are I will be around long enough to see him grow up, and hopefully get married. It’s being managed, so nothing to worry about right now.”
He drops his hands like he’s been burned. A look I’ve never seen before distorts his sharp features. He looks physically pained, and absolutely horrified. “And you told this to my mother? She’s known for two years?”
He takes a step back from me. Then another. “I’ve got to go.”
“Go? What about Tyler?” My heart races as I take in his state. He looks like he’s about to fall apart.
“I — uh —I’ll come back. I— I just shouldn’t be around him until —”
“Ryder, don’t leave like this,” I beg him.
“I’ll be back.”
He turns and walks out the door, looking almost like a zombie. I fall to the floor and cry. It’s all I’ve done lately.
But the sound of the front door opening, and that little voice calling out tells me I don’t have time to fall apart right now. Tyler can’t see me like this.
So, I pick myself up, dry my eyes, and push everything away until I can be alone.
Ryder
Broken Wings
I walk into the house, still completely dazed. It’s like the universe decided my life wasn’t fucked up enough so it decided to dumpeverythingelse on me.
And my fucking mother. All I know is I must’ve tortured puppies in a past life. It’s the only thing that could explain being cursed with someone like her. All the holy water in the Vatican couldn’t cleanse her soul. I’ve always thought I was a bit of a sociopath, but she is fucking psychotic.
“Where’s Tyler?” Dane asks but I just shake my head. My head feels like it’s about to explode.
“Ry, what’s going on?” This comes from Angel.
“I need to be alone for a little while.”
“You look like that’s the last thing you need,” Dane tells me. “What happened?”
I don’t answer. I just keep walking. Somehow, I end up in the basement. Not sure how. I don’t even remember the drive here.
