“I saw him. Only I didn’t know it was him. I just thought he was a good-looking guy interested in me.It wasn’t until he spun me around to face the mirror and told me to....”my voice cuts out. That word. So harmless and used for so many different purposes is such a trigger for me. I realized that even before therapy. It’s not something I can explain to everyone, though.
“He told you to what, Cara? What did he do? Did he hurt you? Are you all right? Do you need me to come get you?”
“Christian, why do you care so much?” I ask, not for the first time.
“You remind me of someone. When I saw you hurt, I thought about it being her,” he tells me. It’s an answer he’s never given before. I wonder what’s changed.“What did he do, Cara?”
“He didn’t do anything. He didn’t get a chance.When he growled that word in my ear, I knew it was him.”
“What did he look like?”
“What?” I ask, not understanding why that matters. Christian knows I never really saw the man.
“Just answer the question,” he demands gruffly.
“Tall, like Jax tall, with dark hair and blue eyes. Had a slight accent, but I don’t know what kind.”
“Do you know where he is now?”
“Of coursenot,” I hiss. “I screamed, and he ran. Liam and Maddox tried to chase after him, but he got lost in the crowd.”
“Where were you?”
“Kyiv. Why? What are you thinking?”
“I think that it was a coincidence that you ran into him.Don’t worry about him. We’ll handle it from here.”
“We?”
“I have to tell them, Cara,” he tells me bluntly.His tone is clear. Nothing I say will change his mind.
“Can you at least tell them not to tell anyone else?” I whisper.
“They don’t bring others in on business. That’s what this is. Thank you for telling me, Cara.”
I nod and end the call.My head spins, and heart races even faster than before at the thought of anyone else knowing what I did. What I caused.
I goto the fridge and grab a bottle of water. I set it on the counter while I grab my medication from my bag. My hands shake so violently I can’t get the bottle open.
Two large, solid hands wrap around mine, removing the bottle from my grip. He opens the bottle, handing me one, then opens the water bottle as well.
I can’t meet his eyes. Shame washes through me. This is why I can’t be with him. Why I will never be enough. He just doesn’t realize it yet. He will soon, then he will forget all about me.
And never in my life has a thought like that hurt so much.
He tips my chin up, but I still avert my eyes.“Look at me, baby.” He’s been calling me that a lot. I have to bite my tongue,so I don’t snap for him to stop.I’m not his baby. I can’t be. But I move my eyes to meet his anyway.The affection shining in those beautiful eyes takes my breath away. “What do you need?”
I take a deep breath, willing myself to calmdown. Can’t say it’s working. “I need to be left alone for a few minutes,” I tell him. “I just need to pull myself together.”
He shakes his head anddrops his hand from my face. I take it he’s letting me. Giving in already.
As I start to turn away, his arm snakes around my waist, taking me by surprise. “You’re not going anywhere. I’ve let youavoid and ignore me. I’ve given you space because I thought thatwas what you needed.”
“It is, Jake,” I insist.
“No, it’s not.You’re not going to push me away anymore. You don’t need space. You needthis.” He pulls me into his chest, wrapping both arms around me in a tight hug. “You need someone to remind you that you’re worth it. That you’re beautiful.”
I give an indignant scoff as I mentally battlebeing in his arms. “You think I don’tknow what I look like?”
