Page 110 of Deceptive Vows


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I’m pretty sure I won’t see him until our wedding day.

That sounds so weird.

We’re getting married, and we’ll have a loveless marriage.

I’m a fake, and he’s my captor.

We exist on lies and secrets.

A mockery to any vow we’ll be taking when we say, ‘I do.’

If I survive, this is what life will be like because we aren’t supposed to be.

This sham is an arranged marriage for business purposes, and I forgot that somewhere along the way. As I lay beneath him repeatedly, I forgot who he was supposed to be to me.

There was never a question of love in the mix. And since I’m not who he thinks I am and I was never supposed to be here, things are working out exactly how they’re supposed to.

At least I know he’s not going to sell me or give me to Ivan. And the only good thing to come of this time apart is seeing more of José.

He’s been working here at the house, but because Sebastian is here, too, José and I hardly have the chance to speak like we did that day over a week ago.

I still take comfort in seeing him. It’s something, and if he’s around, I know I’m safe and there’s hope in some form.

I just wish there weren’t this hole in my heart or this empty feeling in my soul when I think of Mikhail.

This coming weekend will mark one month since he’s been in my life. One month of chaos with this constant push and pull of my heart.

When I asked José more about what was going on, he said things were still the same and Mikhail just wanted more security here. Of course, that just made me curious about what else was going on to make Mikhail want additional security. I didn’t push, however, because I knew José would have told me if there was anything more to tell.

I’ve spent the day outside with Snow. The weather is getting better as it transitions to spring. It hasn’t snowed all week, and there’s a hint of warmth in the air. When you spend as much time outside as I do, you notice things like that.

When it gets dark, I head back to the house to put Snow in her room.

There I see José waiting for me.

“Just checking on you,” he says with a little smile. He crouches down to pat the dog on her head for a moment before he stands. “How are you doing?”

“I’m okay,” I lie. “As okay as I can be.”

“I’m sorry I have no news for you.”

He says the same thing each time.

“That’s okay. At least I’m safe.”

He reaches out to pat my head the way he used to when I was little.

“When we’re free, I’ll get you an ice cream. The biggest one we can buy,” he promises, and I can’t help but chuckle. It’s been so long since I smiled it feels foreign to me.

“Ice cream, José?”

When I was little and life was normal, my parents would meet up with José nearly every weekend. We’d go to the beach, and he’d get the biggest ice cream cone for me. It was he who took that picture I have of my parents and me on the beach. That time, he came with us to see my grandmother. Those are some great memories.

“Never too old, my little chica. You will always be my little girl, and I am your second father. So, I can promise you ice cream when I get you out of this mess. That’s the first thing we’ll buy when we get our first taste of freedom. I’m sure your Papito will forgive me for giving his little girl sweet things.”

“Yes, I’m sure he will, and you can buy me anything you want. Let me take care of you, too.”

He taps my head again. “No. I promised your father I would always take care of you. That’s my job. Nothing is required of you. Only to live. You hear me?”