Tanner pulled the golf cart to a stop and got out his phone.
“What’s up?” I asked.
“Ah, found it.” He handed me his phone. It was open to a princess suite contract on the Society app. He scrolled down and pointed to clause 4:
4) The losing princess shall be spit roasted at the victory banquet by two members of the winning team. The men participating in the spit roast shall be determined in the following way:
4a) Men who have a direct role in her capture get first dibs.
4b) If three or more men are involved in the capture, then the princess shall choose.
4c) If the princess is unable to choose, then the men shall have a rock-paper-scissors tournament. See clause 8d for specifics.
4d) If it is a solo capture, then the man with the most wins during the earlier events…
There were like 12 more subclauses that seemed irrelevant, so I just skipped to the next part.
5) Refusal to participate in the spit roast shall constitute gross misconduct, which results in immediate termination as specified by clause 49d of the Society’s membership agreement.
5a) And in the case of refusal to participate, for her stay in the princess suite, including food and handmaid services, the princess shall be charged a total of $245,120.
I had to read it three times. If I didn’t go through with it I had to pay that exorbitant fee for the room?! “Please tell me that $245,120 is payable in Monopoly money.”
“Nope,” said Tanner as he started driving again. “US dollars.”
Shit!I had been saving money like a boss over the past three months, but not that much money. Not even close.
“I would offer to pay it for you, but I know you don’t want me interfering with your love life.”
“No! I didn’t mean that. I take it all back. I want you to interfere with my love life.” Obviously. I was considering letting him spit roast me. But if he just paid the fine I wouldn’t have to.
“Nope.” He shook his head. “I’m not falling for that trap.”
“So you’re really going to make me do this?”
“What are you so afraid of?”
“We already went over that.”
Tanner laughed. “I meant specifically about the spit roast.”
“It’s like public speaking only a million times worse. Because I’ll be naked. And having sex. With two men!”
“That’s nothing to be ashamed of. And in a way…it’s easier than public speaking. Giving a speech is hard work. Getting spit roasted is easy. Honestly, Cole and I have a lot more to be worried about than you. What if we can’t get it up? Or cum early? Or accidentally make eye contact with each other?”
I laughed at the thought of it. “Well, that would definitely be embarrassing for you. But it’s different since I’m a girl. You’ll get high fives afterwards. I’ll get slut shamed.”
“The Society is a slut shaming free zone.”
“I doubt that. But even if it is…I still don’t want all those people seeing me naked. I have stretch marks on my ass.”
Tanner slowed down and turned to look at me. His deep brown eyes drank in every inch of me. “Your ass is a work of art. And anyway, everyone here has already seen it thanks to that dress.”
“This isnota dress!”
“As one of the most renowned fashion designers in the world, I have to respectfully disagree. Ah, we’re almost here!”
It was fully dark now, but the feast area was impossible to miss. It was lit up like a Christmas tree with a gazillion white lights strung between the trees. A fire blazed in the center of it all, and I was pretty sure I saw a pig being spit roasted. To be clear - I’m talking about an actual pig on a stick spinning over a fire. Not agirl bent over between two dudes. And then a horrible thought occurred to me.
