I’d left New York behind for a reason. Because my dad had painted a picture for me…of everyone being better off without me. Matt being happy. The Untouchables being friends again. Kennedy and Felix possibly becoming more than friends.
I hadn’t believed it at first. I hadn’t wanted to believe it. But I saw the pictures. And then I saw it for myself. The image of Matt in that pool with the brunette girl would always be seared into my brain.
They were all supposed to be better off. So why the hell had James married Isabella? Where were his friends when he needed them? Were they not speaking again? Were they still not friends? My stomach twisted into knots. I was so disappointed that James had married Isabella. Knowing everything she did to me. But I was more disappointed in Matt, Mason, and Rob. They were supposed to have his back. They were supposed to care more than that. It felt like my heart was breaking in two.
“I…” my voice trailed off. Maybe a few years ago, I may have been filled with doubt. Over whether I made the right choice. But it wasn’t my responsibility for anyone else to have a happily ever after. I only had control over my own life. And I couldn’t think about what James was going through. Or anyone else. Sometimes I was bad at putting myself first. But it was really easy for me to put Miller first. To put our baby first. “I don’t want to know any more.”
“Okay.”
I swallowed hard. I needed to believe they were all better off without me. Because I was better off without them.
I looked down at Jacob. Isabella was dead. Which meant he was safe. We were safe.Almost.I tucked Jacob’s blanket a little more snuggly. “Is my father still alive?”
“Yes.”
I nodded. And I did a terrible thing as I snuggled back into Miller’s side. As I looked down at the newborn life, I wished my father would die too. That Miller, Jacob, and I would be safe forever. That my past would never catch up to me.
I needed to believe that. Because I didn’t want to leave my son too early. Like my mom had left me. Like my uncle had left me.
I needed to be here for him.
Runaway - Chapter 47
6 Months Later - Wednesday
I held Jacob to my chest as I stared out at the frozen lake. I had this sense of dread in my chest. And I had no idea why. But I’d felt it with my mom. With my uncle. Like time was ticking down too quickly and I didn’t know how to stop it.
I heard the crunch of snow behind me. And even though I felt like something terrible was about to happen, I didn’t turn around. Because time had only just started ticking down in my head. And I knew it was just Miller walking up behind me on the dock. We were safe.For now.
Miller wrapped his arms around me, kissing the side of my neck. “How are my two favorite people in the world today?”
I sighed, leaning into Miller. “Worried.”
Even though he was behind me, I could sense his frown.
“I think we need to move.”
He held me tighter. “Brooklyn, we’ve been over this. Isabella’s not out there anymore.”
I knew that. And yet…why was I still nervous? “I can’t stop thinking about my dad. And how he said he’d kill you if you ever touched me again.”
“Like this?” He swept my hair to the side and kissed my neck.
I laughed and turned to him. “I’m serious. I can’t lose you. We both need to be here for Jacob.”
Miller leaned down, kissing Jacob’s forehead. And then his fingers disappeared into my hair as he drew my temple to his lips, kissing it. “I know you’re worried, kid. I also know you haven’t been getting much sleep lately. Why don’t you let me take Jacob and you can take a nap before dinner.”
“It’s not because I’m tired, Miller. I feel this sense of doom in my chest.”
He pulled me closer as if he could warm the feeling from my heart.
“I think if we move…”
“Our life is here. And it’s perfect.”
“I know. It’s almost…too perfect.”
He kissed my forehead again. “There’s no such thing as too perfect. I want to raise all our kids here. I want us to grow old here together.”
