Taz is standing, arms crossed just behind Griz, and glares down at Bodie.
My focus shifts to Lily as she speaks to Stone.Her hand is on his shoulder as she circles him.He grabs her waist, pulling her onto his lap.
It’s a straight punch to the chest.The more I watch, the hotter my blood runs.It takes everything I have to sit here and watch.I try to reengage in the conversation around me, but it’s a lost cause.The way he chats her up, the way she flirts sweetly back, and plays up his ego—yeah, both annoy the fuck out of me.But worse is the way she smiles at him.
Fucking Christ.That does something to me, twists my insides into a tight knot.
I want nothing more than to yank her off his lap and slam my fist into his smarmy face.Every word he says is ridiculous, and she eats it up like he’s waxing poetic.Swear to fuck, it’s acid to my goddamn ears.
I grind my jaw and hunch forward over the table.
Fuck.
The music is cranked and shit gets out of hand.Clothes come off, people pair off, and dancers get extra friendly in a way that regular customers pay top dollar for.As long as it’s consensual, I don’t care—except where Lily’s concerned.
The sight of her grinding against Stone a few feet away makes me want to rip out my eyeballs.It’s that fucking painful to watch.His hand freely roams over her ass, and her arm is around his neck, their faces close.Fucking inches apart.
Dozer leans over and nudges me.“Why the fuck didn’t you say somethin’?”
“Say what?”My voice is hoarse, pure gravel.
“Don’t play stupid with me, Goose.We both know how smart you are.”
“She’s my employee.”
He tugs his chair closer and places his large, crossed arms on the table to keep the convo private.“Just ’cause you haven’t gone there, doesn’t mean you can’t.Shit happens.”
“After what went down with Jules and Jaxson?”I shake my head.“How would that look?Plus, it’s not like she’s interested.I mean, look at her, man.”
The displeasure on his face says that answer’s bullshit.“Don’t let a good thing pass you by.Club be damned.”
“That’s rich.”The insinuation about him and Bethany and the history there is left unsaid.
Two frown lines crease his forehead.“Yeah, don’t I fuckin’ know it.There was a time, before she married Hodge, that I didn’t take my shot.I let bullshit get in the way.I regret that.Wish I’d stepped up, and worked to figure our shit out.”
“You still could.”
He shakes his head and looks down at the table.Then he grabs his beer and chugs the rest of it.“It’s about picking the right moment, though.You step up at the wrong time, you’re gonna fuck up a lot of people’s lives, or risk another rejection.Just waitin’ for my next moment.”
I openly stare at Stone and Lily now.They’re so lost in each other, they’re none the wiser.
“This is your fuckin’ moment,” Dozer says, tilting his beer in Lily’s direction.It’s the same moment Stone pulls her face close to his and kisses her.
The jealousy rioting through my body is unlike anything I’ve ever known.It’s a new kind of pain.It stretches and digs deep under my skin.I exhale a pent-up breath and feel the loss of something vital down to my bones.“Nah, man.Think it already fuckin’ passed me by and that shits on me.”
Dozer slaps his large hand on my shoulder.“Welcome to the club inside the club, man.The dumb fuckers who revel in chaos and are full of regrets.”
We both chuckle, and Dozer gets up to grab liquor bottles from behind the bar.He fills our glasses, then clinks his against mine before we each take a large swallow.We get blitzed, and within an hour, I’m too fucked up to care about anything or anyone.
Raven becomes our babysitter and DD.My last memories of the night are of her cursing out my name as her and Dozer help my drunk ass up the stairs to my apartment.That and her asking me, as I tug my shirt off, if I’m solid.
“Fuckin’ peachy,” I grumble, plopping down onto the end of my bed and struggling to take off my boots.The world blacks out after that.
CHAPTER 13
When a person reveals their limits, it is with respect that you acknowledge them, and with love, you cross them when warranted.
JULY 2007
