“Should you go over there?” Megan finishes my thought out loud. “Honestly? I think you’re the only one she’d want right now.”
“I can’t, Megan. I have Lennie to worry about.”
“I’ll take her home. Isaac and I will spend the night at your house.”
“I can’t ask you to do that, Megan,” I breathe, trying to think of my options.
“You’re not asking, Jason. I’m telling you. She needsyou, even if she doesn’t know it. She’s been doing things on her own for so long, even before Brad left her, and she puts on a bright, happy face, but she trusts you. She’ll let you see her crumble. And I think she needs to let you see it.”
Decision made. I need to get to her. I pull my keys out of my pocket, taking my house key off the ring. “Her pajamas are laying out on her bed. It shouldn’t be a problem to get her to sleep. She’ll probably fall asleep in the car, and shit, you need her booster seat,” I halt my words, thinking of all the things Lennie will need.
“I have a seat for Presley she can use,” Megan responds. “I’ve got her. Go tell Lennie that Isaac and I are taking her home. Then go.”
I nod and rush back out to the table where Thomas is still holding Lennie. She’s curled into him, her cheek resting on his chest. When I reach the table, I bend down to her level. “Hey sweetie. I have to go check on Fallon. Auntie Megan and Uncle Isaac are going to take you home and put you to bed, okay?”
Lennie nods. “Is Fallon okay?” she asks. She’s so laid back, she doesn’t even care about Isaac and Megan taking her home, she only cares about Fallon.
“I think so, but she really needs one of Daddy’s hugs,” I tell her. The eyes and ears of the entire table are on us, and hopefully it doesn’t raise too many questions.
“You do give really good hugs, Daddy,” Lennie replies, reaching her arms out to me for a hug herself.
I squeeze my daughter tightly, then pass her over to Megan. “Okay, I’ll see you in the morning, sweetie.”
The table says their goodbyes, everyone’s eyes concerned and worried, but I don’t have time to address them right now. Hopefully Megan can take care of it. If Iwas worried about people figuring out something is going on between Fallon and me, they definitely know now.
With a final goodbye, I rush to the bar, updating Laila that I’m leaving, and head out the front door to run to my car. I may be running in blind, but Fallon needs me, so that’s where I’ll be. I drive across town to her house, focusing on getting to her.
When I pull into her driveway, her house is dark, silent, and almost eerie looking. Her car is parked in the driveway though, so I know she’s home. I get out of the car and take a deep breath, heading up to her front door. I knock on the door loudly.
After a minute with no response, I try again. Is she sleeping? I try the door and find that it’s locked, so it’s not like I can try and sneak in. I’m about to raise my arm to knock one more time when the lock clicks and the door opens a crack.
Fallon peeks through the crack. Her blonde hair is a tangled mess around her head, her face blotchy, green eyes leaking a steady stream of tears. When she sees it’s me, she crumples.
32
FALLON
Isink to my knees at the sight of Jason at my front door. His eyes are full of so much anguish, so much worry, I lose it. He’s here. I don’t know how he knew I needed him, but he did. He’s here, and I finally break. The final piece that I’ve been trying to hold together for hours finally shatters.
“Shh,” Jason croons, opening the door further to let himself in. He kneels in front of me, wrapping his arms around my body and pulling me into him. “I’ve got you, sunshine. Let it out.”
I do. I let all the pain I’ve kept buried explode as he holds me in the entryway of my house. He closed the door at some point, giving us privacy from the leering eyes of my neighbors.
I let him hold me until some of my tears dry, and all the while, Jase is murmuring words of encouragement in my ears, telling me it’s okay to cry, to give him my pain. He doesn’t even know what’s wrong with me, and yet he’s here, taking care of me.
I pull away from him and work to stand. Jason helps me,holding me up and in his embrace. I was trying so hard to keep my shit together today, but something finally made me snap. I still don’t know what it was. I knew today was going to be hard, but I’d hoped the festivities would help keep my mind off things. It did to an extent, but there is only so much I could do to keep myself present.
I lead Jason down the hall toward my bedroom, where I’ve been wallowing since I got home. He follows, kicking off his shoes and holding my hand. I’m still in my dress from earlier. When I got home, I was unable to even think about changing. Now, I want it off. I need to get rid of the scratchy fabric and out of this fucking bra.
Tears are still silently streaming down my face, but having Jason here is sort of like a Band-Aid on the bullet wound. I’m not naive. I know I’ll need to give him some explanation, but for now, all I can do is change.
I dig in my dresser, sliding my dress off my shoulders and letting it fall onto the carpeted floor in a puddle of fabric. I throw on a cotton shirt, and take my bra off underneath it, throwing that to the ground as well. Jason stands close by me the entire time, his hand resting on my hips and moving to let my dress fall, and help me pull the shirt down. His constant contact is helpful, something to ground me.
Once I’m ready, I head over to my bed, climbing in. I reach my hand out for Jason, and love that he doesn’t question it. He strips down to his boxers and climbs in behind me. His body molds into mine, and he pulls me against his chest.
“Thank you for coming,” I tell him through a shuddering breath.
“I’m sorry I wasn’t here sooner,” he replies. “I was trying to find you for like an hour. No one knew where you were, until finally Megan told me you weren’t okayand left.”
