Lupe shooed us off her porch. “Bye now. You two go eat popcorn balls and…cuddle.”
Two blocks later we arrived at a single-story cream puff whose covered porch invited me to sit on its vintage metal glider. “Want to take a break and make out?”
“There are no breaks in trick-or-treating.” Olivia inspected a row of mums and a garden flag that declared the owner to be a Hufflepuff. “Her doorbell’s broken, so you’ll need to knock.”
“For the record, my make out idea was a sound one.” I set my knuckles to the door. “This one won’t yell at me like Marge, right?”
Olivia laughed. “Quite the opposite.”
The screen door creaked open, and a young woman wearing an orange cardigan and a wholesome floral dress greeted us. She pushed up her glasses with a finger.
“Hi,” I said.
“Hi?” The woman repeated, studying me over her glasses. “That’s not what you say. Olivia, didn’t you coach him?”
Olivia tsk-tsked. “Use your big boy words, Lachlan.”
The current Mrs. Hayes was enjoying my discomfort a little too much, but somehow I would get her back.
I stuck out my candy bag and recited my line with more energy. “Trick or treat.”
“There you go,” Olivia said. “You’re getting it. Lachlan, this is Tillie Smyth. She’s a children’s librarian at the Sugar Creek library. Tillie, this is Lachlan Hayes.”
“Our patrons love the graphic novels based on your games, Mr. Hayes.”
I shouldn’t admit it, but I was mighty proud of the books. I donated them by the truckload every month, hoping they might inspire wayward, lonely kids like I’d been. “It’s Lachlan.”
“Tonight it’s Sir Lachlan the Brave,” Olivia corrected.
“I think she means Sir Lachlan Whose Pants Are So Tight He’s Losing Circulation.” They did not want me to get into the topic of chafing. “And thank you, Tillie.”
“You’ll have to come by and speak to our teens sometime,” the librarian said. “We have a gaming club.”
“I’d be glad to.”
Satisfied, Tillie threw two Sugar Creek Library bookmarks in the bag. “Those bookmarks include instructions for getting your own library card.” Then she added two king-sized bags of M&M’s. “Easy sign-up online. Come on down, and we’ll find you the perfect book.”
“Thank you.”
“He’d like to donate some gaming systems and copies of autographedMars Warsbooks,” Olivia said.
“Get out!” Tillie clasped a hand over her mouth. “That would be amazing.”
“Happy Halloween, Tillie!” Olivia took my hand and led me down the steps. “We need to keep moving. We have a schedule to keep, and I’ve yet to score any Sour Patch Kids.”
“See you at book club, Olivia!” the librarian called.
We visited more houses, but after about twenty stops, I lost count. I carried a bag so full of candy, I’d need to upgrade to a wheelbarrow if we added more.
“One final house,” Olivia told me. “Let’s drive for this one.”
The sun had long set, and now the moon kept us company as we walked toward Olivia’s SUV. Families shuffled by, with excited children leading the way. Streetlights flickered above, casting luminous shadows of Olivia and me onto the pavement.
Even with the occasional moments of awkwardness, I’d had a blast tonight. Olivia and I had laughed as we’d journeyed through the neighborhood. She’d regaled me with tales of everyone we met, leaving no gossipy detail unshared.
I’d awakened this morning with my usual birthday dread, but my unexpected wife had turned it all around. She’d made the day into something I enjoyed. I mean, sure, the candy was great, but being with Olivia tonight almost felt like home.
Were we just getting that good at faking it?
