“I think the world of them, and those fucking shrinks convinced them that I couldn’t love them the way a child they shared DNA with could.”
I slammed my head against the headstone. “It’s why I had such a hard time with your relationship with Ryder. I believed you, baby. But I felt like I had to be an asshole about it, so you knew I loved you. I convinced myself that if I didn’t act like a jealous ass, you wouldn’t believe me when I said I loved you. Guess it didn’t work, huh?”
I blew out a frustrated breath. “Maybe if Haizley had come along sooner, she could have taught me a thing or two and you would have trusted me with your secret. I don’t blame you. I did at first. Blamed Ryder too. Threatened to kill him. Only I meant it that time. I was in a bad place, so get off my ass,” I snapped.
“I fixed things with him. We’ll never be BFFs like you and him. But I don’t want to rip his head off every time I see him. I’d say that’s progress. Rose and I had dinner with him and Ellie and the girls. I don’t want you to be jealous, baby, but Tabby climbed right up into her lap. I think she recognized something in Rose. Something familiar.”
I ran my fingertips over her name. “I love you, Rachel. You’ll always hold a piece of my heart. But I’m gonna do what you asked and I’m gonna give Rosie the rest. And yes, I’ll give her your cut. Don’t know why I can’t buy her a new one. But if that’s what you want, I’ll do it.”
I swiped the tears away. “I’ll never forget you, baby. When she’s ready, I’ll bring her by so you can meet her.”
I stood up and brushed the dirt and grass off my ass. I turned around and froze.
“How long have you been standing there?” I asked.
Blade looked away. “Since boomer,” he said, voice tight. His jaw ticked as his hands went into his pockets.
I nodded. He’d basically heard everything. I’d known Blade a long time, now. Longer than I’d known Rachel and Ryder. Ryder was Rachel’s best friend, and it was only fair I spoke to him first. Rose was right. He didn’t deserve to be blindsided.
But I’d forgotten about Blade. He was Rachel’s friend, too. But he was my brother. I owed him.
“I’m sorry I didn’t come to you. I should have.”
He nodded, but didn’t look at me. Just continued to stare out across the cemetery.
“I didn’t know you were adopted.”
Ok, not where I thought this would go.
“No one does. I never told Rach. I don’t even think King knows. Nav probably does.” I shrugged as if it was nothing. Because it truly was nothing. It didn’t change who I was, who my mom and dad were. It was just a line in my past.
A footnote.
“Sometimes I wish I had been adopted,” he said.
“Then how would you call King on his bullshit?”
He smiled at that. “Yea.” He finally turned his eyes to me. “I’m not pissed that you met someone. I’m not even really mad that it’s so soon. This life is different. Despite us getting out of the shit in Little Rock, we still live every day as if it’s our last. But you should have come to me.”
“I know,” I said, my eyes on my boots.
“I don’t think you fucking do. She was my friend. My little sister.”
My head shook up and down as I silently agreed with him.
“I know this doesn’t make it right. But I don’t think of you as Rachel’s friend. You’re my brother, Blade. Just like King. Just like Jack and Gunner. All the guys from Arkansas. You were my brother before Rachel was my old lady. You’re in a different category.”
His head leaned to the side as he considered my words. “And Ryder’s not?”
“No,” I said quickly, shaking my head for emphasis. “Ryder’s only been a brother for a few months. You’ve been my brother for years.”
He blew out a breath. “I guess that makes sense.”
I studied his face. “Did you come out here to fucking tattle on me?”
The side of his mouth curled up before his head dropped and I couldn’t see his face.
“I can’t fucking believe this shit.” I walked over to him and punched him in the arm.
