I don’t have the full story yet but in this moment I can’t bring myself to care. Jude is lying on an operating table. Freya’s arms are covered in his blood
“I have to arrest her,” I say.
Freya crosses her arms and her gaze burns into me. “No, you don’t. You’re the chief of the SCU, River. Find a loophole, write a new rule. I don’t care how you do it, just do it. She stays with us.”
“Freya…” I reach out to her, but her gaze flicks over my shoulder as footsteps approach.
“Jude Elroy’s family?” A man in full scrubs with brown hair a few shades darker than his skin takes us in.
“Here.” Freya weaves around me to face the surgeon.
His eyes crinkle as he smiles. “The surgery went well. We were able to stem the bleeding and remove the bullet arthroscopically so he should heal quicker. He lost a lot of blood, but he should make a full recovery.”
The steel band that’s been ratcheting around my chest loosens and I take my first full breath in what feels like hours.
Freya’s shoulders drop and beside us Eli folds Oz into a hug.
“Can we see him?” Freya asks.
The surgeon clasps his hands together. “We’re just bringing him down from the ICU now. I’ll have the nurse let you know when he’s ready.”
Freya nods. “Thank you.”
The surgeon leaves and for a moment none of us speak. Little by little my control returns and most of my anger drains away. Jude’s alive. He’s going to be alright.
Oz pulls away from Eli and draws Freya into a hug. She slips her arms around him, burying her face in his chest, and my heart pangs with longing and jealousy. I want her to need me like that but lately all I seem to make her do is push me away.
Eli’s hand lands on my shoulder. “You still functioning?”
I nod.
He looks over at Angelica. “You can’t arrest her,” he says.
I sigh. “I know.”
A year ago, I never would have considered bending the rules but it’s becoming increasingly clear that I will break every single rule in the book for Freya Danvers.
I have very little control when it comes to her and when she pulls away from Oz and starts walking down the hall, I panic.
“We still need to talk, Freya.”
She stops and shakes her head before turning around. “No,” she says, her face blank. “I’m done. You can put a tracker on me. You can lock me up. But you cannot force me to talk to you.”
I keep her trapped in my gaze, trying to figure out what I can say to make her stay, to stop her from hating me, but then a nurse appears at the end of the hall.
He smiles at Freya and I want to punch him in the nose.
“You can come see him now. Maybe just one of you to start with though.”
Freya looks back at Oz.
He gives a soft smile and waves her away. “Go. We’ll be in soon.”
I have to force myself to stay still as Freya leaves. I clench my fists and tell myself she’s not going to disappear. She’s back and with her new bracelet on she can go nowhere without me knowing.
But somehow, right now, she feels further away than ever.
22
