Deck chuckled and ran a hand over his face, blushing.
“What?” I asked.
He stifled his laughter. “Nothing. You just reminded me. I had anincidentwith Eliazar the other day. And—chingado—I support him and all, but I’m still not okay.”
By his red cheeks and the way he laughed, I guessed this story was more embarrassing than truly upsetting. “What happened?”
Deck leaned his forehead into his hands as he shook his head.
“Okay, now you have to tell me.”
Finally, he looked up. “So we were coming out of Fink’s room after sixth period, you know, because Eliazar and I have the same math class." He cleared his throat. "Anyway, I needed some paper and didn’t have any. I grabbed Eliazar’s backpack to look for some, but I found something…else.”
I knew Eliazar had been experimenting with more than weed lately, same as Johnny, but finding drugs in his friend’s backpack would not make Deck red in the face. Not like this.
My brows furrowed. “What?”
He angled his head against the couch, stretching his neck as he spoke to the ceiling. “I didn’t know what it was at first when I saw the box, so I had to ask Eliazar to explain… But I guess it was a…um, you know…like a…”
Deck stopped, looking like he wanted the floor to swallow him.
“Ohmygod what?” I prodded.
“A douche kit,” he muttered.
“A…douche kit?” It took me a minute to put the pieces together. Why would Eliazar need—? “Oh…” My cheeks heated. “Oh.”
“Yeah, he got pretty awkward telling me. I tried to make him feel better by saying it was okay and all that. That I was just surprised.”
“I’ll bet,” I chuffed. “Poor Eliazar.”
“I meant what I’ve always said. I’ll throw down with anyone who messes with Eliazar. He eats enough shit about it at home without having to worry about it coming from his boys. But that doesn’t mean I want to think about all the details, you know?”
“Yeah, yeah. I get it.” I smiled lightly. “This will be a funny story someday, even if it’s weird now.”
Deck seemed to relax into the cushion. “I guess he had a plan to meet up with somehombreafter school.”
A brick settled in my stomach. “Is he meeting up with men from those apps again? Is that safe?”
Eliazar was like a brother to me. He’d been a Hope Center kid too, and still stopped by occasionally to see Rosa. If Deck was the leader of their crew, Cruz the enforcer, and Johnny the joker, then Eliazar was the sweet one. The most trusting, most breakable.
“He can handle himself,” Deck replied. “He grew up here too. Although I wonder how many of those assholes know he’s seventeen.”
“Well, you don’t have to worry about any app guys tonight,” I said. “Eliazar went out with my brother.”
Deck hmphed. “Not sure that’s much safer these days. The two of them together… They’ve been getting up to some shit.”
I felt the defeat in his voice to the core of my soul. At moments like these, when I knew he needed me, I loved Deck too much to let him keep me at arm’s length. I moved the bag of chips onto the coffee table and sat closer to him on the couch, our legs touching. “I get that you’re worried. Believe me, I understand.”
“I know you do,” he whispered gruffly.
His intense stare sent shivers down my spine.
I watched his chest rise and fall as I remained motionless, allowing him to look his fill and letting him find his anchor.
I also waited for him to stand. Push me away. Put distance between us.
He didn’t.
