Page 167 of Illicit Games


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“Yeah, Rainbow.” I find us a spot and tug us down onto the sand. She leans her head against my chest, sitting close with her back flush against my torso.

The sky is clear, highlighting the thousands of stars like diamonds. The low breeze ruffles her long hair, raising goosebumps along her arms. I rub my palm along her flesh to warm her up, wishing I had brought a jacket. She’s in one of my T-shirts and shorts.

“I’ve never been to a more heavenly place than this.” She sighs. “We can’t stay here forever, though.”

“Why not?”

“Our whole life is back in the city. You’d eventually have to go back to work. I have to finish my degree.”

“We can do it remotely from here.” Playing with her silky strands, I murmur, “We never have to go back if you don’t want to.”

“And you’ll be happy?”

“I’m the happiest when I’m with you. So yeah, I will be.”

She turns quiet, absently stroking my knuckles. After a few minutes, she asks, “What did you mean when you said we can still have our dreams? You meant that about having kids, didn’t you?”

I take it as a good sign she’s discussing this, rather than avoiding and pretending something tragic didn’t happen to her.

“I did,” I answer. “We can be parents, Iris. We can adopt a beautiful child who needs two people who will love him or her unconditionally. I know it isn’t how we imagined it happening. I wish I could turn back time so you didn’t have to lose an important part of you. But if this is the hand we’re dealt, we can make something special come out of it. It’s all up to you, whatever you decide.”

“Maybe,” she whispers.

“You are meant to be a mother, Rainbow.”

“I stopped taking the birth control pills.”

My muscles pull taut at her admission.

“A few days before… the incident happened,” she continues sadly. “I wish I had done it sooner. Or never taken them in the first place. Maybe we’d be…”

“Yeah, I know.”

Our attention is stolen by the ocean as the waves become larger and faster. The sounds like a peaceful lullaby as the water crashes against the shore.

Iris rubs against me as a shiver passes through her.

“Let’s go in,” I softly command. “We’ll bring a blanket and a jacket for you tomorrow so we can stay longer.”

“Okay.”

Bending, I haul her up with an arm around her waist. She wraps her legs and hands around me, hiding her face against my neck.

“I never said it, but I love our home, Kian. It’s perfect and everything I’ve ever desired. Thank you for giving it to me.”

“I meant it when I said we can stay here forever.”

“I know you did.”

Once we make it back inside and into the bedroom, I lay her on her side and climb in after her. She shifts closer,snuggling into me. It’s the best feeling in the world. One I will never take for granted.

“I love you, my little Rainbow.”

“I love you more.”

Iris

The sudden coldness in my body stirs me awake.