The sound of a hard thud made all of us turn to look. It was my uncle, setting a crystal salt-shaker on a nearby side table. This was followed by the pepper shaker, three spoons, and a white dish cloth.
My aunt sighed. "Well, this is just lovely."
Ignoring her, I zoomed in on my uncle. I justhadto ask, "Why the dish cloth?"
He glanced around. "What dish cloth?"
I didn't even know what to say.
Next to me, Joel said, "It was for the shakers. So they didn't break."
Of course.I knew that. Or at least, I should've. Obviously, the whole sorry scene was turning my brain to mush.
Across from us, my aunt was giving my uncle the look of death. Under her breath, she said, "I'llbreak something, alright."
Funny, I wanted to break something too. I gave her a hard look. "How about you?"
"What about me?" she said.
"Fork it over."
"Forkwhatover?"
I crossed my arms and waited.
"Oh, alright. Fine." She reached into her purse and pulled out a crystal candlestick. She marched to the side table and slammed the candlestick onto it, next to the shakers. She turned toward us and said, "There. You happy now?"
Why lie? "No."
"Why not?" she demanded.
I eyed her purse. "Because that purse is too big for one candlestick."
She lifted her chin. "I'll have you know, this is a Fendi."
I smiled. "And I'll haveyouknow, I've got rubber gloves in the kitchen."
In the end, it didn't come to that. After a lot more haggling, along with my reluctant promise to not press charges if, andonlyif, she cooperated, she finally thrust her purse in my direction. By the time it was all over, I'd recovered the matching candlestick, along with a silver gravy boat and the matching ladle.
Two ladles – even for them, that had to be some kind of record.
My aunt looked to my uncle. "Are you getting the car or not?"
I spoke up. "Wait. You can't go yet."
Her gaze narrowed. "Why not?"
"Because youstillhaven't told me how you got in."
"Yes, I did," Aunt Vivian said. "Remember?"
I rolled my eyes. "Give me a break. The doorwasn'topen. I checked it before bed."
She smirked. "Well, maybe you didn't check it good enough."
We were still going back and forth when Bishop emerged from who-knows-where. He looked to me and said, "Hey Melody."
"What?"
