Okay, that wasn't helping my stomach.
Suddenly, I was glad to be out on the balcony. If I had to hurl, I was in the right place, well, except when I considered the people on the lower balconies.
Obviously, they'd see things differently.
I shook my head. "I don't get it."
"What don't you get?"
"All the inconsistencies." Quickly, I rattled them off. "You know them, but you don't know them. You saw them, but not alive." I swallowed. "They're dead, but you had nothing to do with it."
"Pretty much."
I gave him a hard look. "And how, exactly did they die?"
"Badly."
"Badly? Is that a joke?"
"Eh, just quoting Moe. Although, he didn't put it so nice."
I threw up my hands. "See? That's the kind of stuff I mean. You're quoting him, but you'renotquoting him."
"Trust me," he said. "The exact quote? You don't want it."
I hesitated. Okay, about this, he might be right. Besides, I had another question. "And how is it that you came home looking so cheerful?"
"I was cheerful because the fuckers killed each other. A nice happy ending. Who doesn't love that?"
I stared up at him. "I doubttheyloved it."
My head was swimming. It was like there were all these weird puzzle pieces, scrambled around on some giant, dark table. I didn't know how the pieces fit, or what I should do now.
And why was Jake telling me this?
But of course, the answer tothatquestion was obvious. He was telling me because I'd demanded to know. In hindsight, maybe I should've dropped the whole thing.
Silently, I turned to look out over the city. From this far up, the view was undeniably beautiful. But down below, things weren't always so pretty. I'd known that, of course, but Jake's story was a cruel reminder of just how ugly things could be.
I let out a long, weary breath, wondering what else I was missing. Next to me Jake shifted, and soon, I felt his arms wrap tight around my waist, holding me gently from behind.
His voice, softer now, drifted down to me. "Don't think about it. It's not worth it."
Probably, he was right. I leaned back against him, suddenly exhausted with the whole sordid situation. Still, I didn't want to wonder later on, so I forced myself to say, "You might as well tell me the rest."
"Why?" he asked.
"Because if you don't," I admitted, "I'll probably be searching the internet tomorrow."
"Trust me. It's not on the internet."
Somehow, I doubted that. It seemed to me that everything was on the internet these days. "Then just give me the short version," I said. "What happened?" I tried to smile. "Starting when I went on that stupid walk."
He lowered his head, and his mouth grazed my ear. In a voice that was almost a caress, he said, "So you admit it was stupid, huh?"
"Oh, stop rubbing it in," I said. "Just tell me, okay?"
"Alright. Here's the short version. It started to rain. You ran off. They ran after you. Moe intercepted them–"
