“Yep. So I’ve heard,” Seth said.
“Sorry,” Lorna muttered.
“Don’t be. The condemnation is deserved.” He shifted his gaze to his door. “I guess I’d better go deal with my child’s bitter disappointment.” He gave Lorna a sort of two-finger salute and went into his apartment.
Lorna remained standing in her partially opened doorway. Poor Bean. She knew what it was like to be the odd one out. She shut the door and went to her small bathroom, where she dragged a brush through her hair and straightened out her sensible blouse. Then she went to rouse Aggie from her bed. “Come on, girl,” she said. “Bean needs you.”
Aggie leaped up from bed, her nub of a tail wagging at justthe mention of Bean’s name. Lorna took her across the hall and knocked on 1B. Moments later, Seth answered the door. He’d removed his outer shirt and was wearing a T-shirt and some joggers. Lorna was momentarily struck by the size of his biceps. She hadn’t seen biceps like that up close and personal in a very long time, and they sent a tiny shiver up her spine and froze her brain. “Umm...”
Seth didn’t seem to notice her gawking; he was watching Aggie walk right past him like this was her house and disappear into the apartment. He turned back to Lorna, curious.
“I thought she might help soothe hurt feelings. She always does for me.”
“You know what? That’s a great idea. Thank you.” He opened the door a little wider. “Come in.”
“Oh no. I don’t want to intrude.” Or bore him to death while she tried to make small talk, which was more likely.
“Please, I could use the company. If you have time, that is.”
She had nothing but time. “Well. Okay. But I’m horrible at small talk.”
“I know.” He smiled, and his eyes twinkled in the low light.
Lorna resisted the urge to put her hand to her throat. She didn’t feel like herself—her limbs were jittery, her blood sparkly.
“Just come in, Lorna. I’m not exactly a master at small talk either, but I think we can manage.”
“Okay.” She took a tentative step inside. She could hear Bean speaking low to Aggie, the sound coming from the direction of what would have been Nana’s room. She and Seth were in the old den. If Lorna kept her gaze directly in front of her, she could imagine her mother in a chair, smoking a cigarette, flipping through the pages of a magazine. Or maybe, if she was lucky, she could imagine Nana knitting, like she used to do in the early days, when Lorna and Kristen would lie on the floor at her feetand cut out houses and people from magazines for their storybooks. Before Nana was drunk all the time. When exactly had that started happening?
“Would you like a beer?”
She jerked her gaze to Seth. She debated telling him she didn’t really drink, but that, on top of no small talk, seemed too much. How insufferable could one person be? “Sure. Thanks.”
“Coming right up.” He walked into what used to be a large bath. She didn’t know where the bath was in this apartment now.
She looked around while he got the beers. His furniture was standard, without a lot of character, one of those purchase-an-entire-room packages. She shifted her weight, uncertain how to fit her body in this familiar yet not familiar space. She felt stiff, like a robot. Why could she not relax? It had been years since she lived with her family here. So many people gone, so many things changed. In fact, she had a sudden memory of her last time in this room. Her mother was shouting at her to stop her damn crying.
“I’ve got some low-carb beer,” Seth said. “Hope that’s okay. It’s a thing now, I guess.”
Lorna didn’t know if it was a thing or not and said nothing as she took the beer he handed her. She looked at the label.
“No good?” he asked.
“Umm... I haven’t tasted it.”
“Well, you can trust me that it won’t be great,” he said with a chuckle. “I failed to mention that it’s also budget beer.”
Lorna smiled. She liked his honesty. She hated beer, truth be told. But she sipped it, and it wasn’t terrible. “It’s okay,” she said, noting the surprise in her voice.
He laughed. “Shocker, I know. Want to sit?” He gestured for her to have a seat on the sofa, then moved papers and Bean’s backpack off a chair for himself. Lorna sat on the edge of thecouch, her back straight. Seth had some darkness under his eyes and the beginning of a beard on his face and chin. She wondered how he slept, if he heard Martin’s marching band practice at night like she did.
He glanced up to see her staring at him, and Lorna quickly averted her gaze.Great.Her awkward self was not going to let her be. Her gaze happened to land on the windowsill and one of her Precious Moments figurines.Oh, hello, how did you get here?Had Bean taken it without asking? Surely Seth didn’t collect them too. She leaned slightly forward. The figurine was of a woman in a sun hat and a boy with a puppy.
“I must look like crap,” Seth said, drawing her attention back to him. “I’ve been working a lot. Too much.” He took a long swig of beer. “I’m having trouble keeping my hours down. I’d offer you a snack, but the cupboard is bare. Turns out, I suck at the single-parenting thing.”
“I’m sure that’s not true,” Lorna said.
Seth sighed and shoved his fingers through his hair. “You know, Bean’s mom and I struggled to make ends meet when he was a baby. There was always something, right? But then I got this great promotion at the university—I work in IT—and for once, things were looking up. It was longer hours, but we were both okay with that. It meant more money, more freedom. She got a better job, too, and Bean was in school. We had plans, we were doing things on weekends, we were planning trips and talking about the future, and I thought I had it made. Then—wham—she gets hit by a bus.”
