Not two weeks ago she’d thought—hoped—there might be something between them. Hadn’t they stood right here, alone in this very room, his hand resting gently on her cheek? Hadn’t she been certain he would kiss her?
And now they were arguing, throwing barbs like common enemies.
It wasn’t the harsh words that upset her most—it was the loss of camaraderie. That sweet, fragile companionship that had begun to take root between them.
They weren’t lovers. They weren’t even friends anymore.
And that loss, that quiet absence of his presence in her life, was the ache she could not ignore, no matter how hard she tried.
CHAPTER 29
“You said what to her?” Julian exclaimed the next week as they took their drinks together.
“You heard me,” Nathaniel replied coolly.
“You truly mean to push her away—as hard and as far as possible?” Julian shook his head. “It’s as though you were forced to marry your wicked aunt. You act as though she were a dreadful mother-in-law, not your wife.”
“I did not want her to be my wife,” Nathaniel muttered. “I would’ve rather kept her as a wicked aunt-in-law.”
“What has happened?” Julian asked, perplexed. “I am utterly confused. I know the two of you have always quarreled, but it was good-natured, almost flirtatious. I was certain that, eventually, you’d find your way to each other.”
“Well, we have not. And we shall not. We have not spoken since that night.”
“You mean beyond wishing each other a good day and discussing matters of the house?—?”
“No,” Nathaniel said sharply, draining the last of his whiskey. He banged the glass down and snapped his fingers for the waiter. “We have not spoken at all. We avoid one another. I noticed her lingering in the doorway of the parlor the other day while I was finishing breakfast. She was waiting for me to leave.”
“Is she afraid of you?” Julian asked, eyes narrowing.
Nathaniel laughed bitterly. “I would wager Evelyn fears no man. Certainly not me. No, she simply did not wish to speak to me. For which I am grateful. The less we see of one another, the better.”
“What has happened to you?” Julian leaned forward. “You are bitter—and not the entertaining sort—when you go on some droll tangent filled with witticisms. No, this is the sort of bitter that drives a man to drown his sorrows not just in his cups, but in entire barrels.”
“I’m not bitter, Julian,” Nathaniel sighed. “I’m exasperated. It seems I am destined to do and be exactly what my uncle always said.”
“Which is?”
“He always said I would do everything wrong and be a failure as a duke. Well, he never said it to me, but I overheard him tell my stepfather once.”
Julian folded his arms. “Do you not think perhaps you are fulfilling that prophecy by acting this way? Have you even tried to speak with her? To simply sit with her and discover what has gone?—”
“What has gone wrong,” Nathaniel interrupted, “is that I did not do as I said I would. I said I would find her a husband. I let her play games for so long, and now all the pieces have been taken off the chessboard—until I was the only one left.”
“That’s not entirely true,” Julian replied. “Did you not tell me the reason you had to marry her was because my cousin found the two of you nearly kissing in your study?”
Nathaniel leaned back, rubbing his temples. “Yes, yes. But that never would’ve happened had I simply done what I said—found her a husband. Sent her back to her father. Done anything differently.”
Julian paused. “Nathaniel… do you love her?”
Nathaniel nearly choked on his fresh whiskey. “Have you listened to anything I’ve said?”
“I have. But it seems I’m the only one who’s heard what you meant.” Julian’s voice dropped. “Your feelings for your wife arequite clear. Only your stubbornness keeps you from admitting them.”
“Don’t be foolish. Besides, she has made it clear she needs no husband. She’s been toiling away at the dower house for days now with her aunt and sisters, working on that society of hers.”
“Yes, I’ve heard of it,” Julian said. “A society to bring together ladies interested in effecting change. Annabelle is rather keen on joining.”
“I don’t even understand what all the foolishness is,” Nathaniel said, scowling. “All I know is she’s commandeered my footmen to carry furniture back and forth for purposes beyond my understanding.”
