Ophelia shook her head, a glimmer of amusement in her eyes. “We both know that is not who you are anymore.”
“Is it not?” he asked dryly. “That is how society sees me.”
“Because you want them to,” Ophelia replied.
She was right, of course. For years, he had indulged in the libertine life, frequenting salons and bedrooms alike. In part, he had wanted to challenge his father’s ridged rule, especially after his mother’s untimely death. Another part had been his genuine desire for distraction for affection, even if it was not real and would not last. A night spent in the warm bed of a lady who truly desired his company had been worth his father’s wrath the following day.
But the dukedom had changed him. His pursuits had grown more restrained, and while he had in the past been glad to spend his time jumping of bedchamber to bedchamber, such pursuits had frown rate. However, he had ensured that his reputation remained intact. Even Jonathan, his closest friend, remained unaware of the extent of his transformation. Only Ophelia truly knee – and she knew his reasons for keeping the image of the rakish duke up.
Ophelia’s voice drew him back. “Perhaps this marriage is a blessing in disguise.”
He frowned. “How so?”
“Emma is superb, perhaps what started as fake can become real,” she began, but he held up a hand to stop her.
“No,” he said firmly. “That is a road I cannot take.”
Ophelia sighed, studying him intently. “Evan, I know you fear becoming your father. But you are not him. You could find happiness with Emma if you allowed yourself to try.”
He shook his head, memories of his childhood flashing unbidden through his mind. The shouting, the slaps, his mother’s cries of pain and humiliation—all of it lingered like a shadow over his soul. “I will not risk it. The only way to avoid his mistakes is to avoid a true marriage altogether.”
“Evan—”
“The less Emma knows of me, the better,” he said, his tone final. “And the same goes for you. Perhaps you should focus on repairing what remains of your friendship with her.”
Ophelia hesitated. “I do not know if she would forgive me for the things I said.”
“You won’t know unless you try,” he countered. “I think you would find it worthwhile. You are unhappy, Ophelia, and I imagine having your friend back could do you some good.”
Before she could respond, a carriage arrived, and her expression shifted to one of resignation. “My mother has come for me. I must go.”
As she turned to leave, Evan called after her. “The orphanage. That is where you will find her.”
Ophelia nodded, a faint smile on her lips as she departed.
CHAPTER 20
Emma
.
Morning sunlight streamed through the tall windows of the manor, illuminating the polished wooden staircase as Emma descended with her customary grace. A neat stack of papers rested in her arms, carefully cradled like a precious burden. Her thoughts were already at the orphanage, where eager little faces awaited her stories.
As she reached the grand hall, the heavy sound of the front door opening drew her gaze. Evan stepped inside, his commanding presence framed by the light spilling in from the entryway.
“Good morning,” Emma greeted, her tone polite and practiced, her slight curtsy conveying all the decorum expected of her.
“Good morning, Emma,” he replied, his voice even, his expression as inscrutable as ever.
Emma adjusted the papers in her arms, preparing to move past him. Their exchanges were rarely more than brief formalities. However, as she stepped forward, his voice halted her.
“Where are you bound this morning?” he asked.
She paused mid-step, surprised by the inquiry. Evan had never taken much interest in her comings and goings. Turning toward him, she replied with measured composure, “To the orphanage, Your Grace. I mean Evan.” She still forgot to call him by his name instead of his title at times.
He inclined his head slightly, his eyes narrowing as if to study her. “And how have you found your return there? Are you pleased to be back?”
Emma blinked, taken aback by the question. “Yes,” she answered after a moment, her voice softening. “Very much so. The children have been most welcoming, and I have enjoyed reading to them.”
