“But I misled him,” Esther said. “Every time we’re together, he reminds me of it. How he knew he loved me because I wasn’t after his money. How he knew I was different from every other young lady he’s met. And I’mnotdifferent, am I? Not really. I was after the same things the rest of them were. I just happened to fall in love along the way. That’s the only difference.”
“It matters, Lady Esther,” Amelia said. “What you’re saying makes sense, and I do understand your feelings. But you have to consider that the Dukewillbe getting what he desires, in the end.”
“Will he?” Esther asked. “He wanted a courtship with a lady who had no interest in wealth or status.”
“No,” Amelia said. “He wanted a marriage to a lady who could love him. The real him, and not simply the title he holds. Are you that lady? Do you care more for the gentleman than his title and riches?”
“I do,” Esther admitted. “I never expected to. But I believe I would marry him now no matter who he was.” She sighed. “Not that my parents would give their consent to that.”
“But it doesn’t matter,” Amelia said. “The Duke understands what your parents see in him. He’s not bothered by that, is he?”
“Not excessively,” Esther said. “He said it was worth dealing with them if it meant he could continue to have me in his life.”
“Exactly,” Amelia said triumphantly. “He doesn’t mind that your mother craves social advancement, or that your father is in dire need of money. What matters to him is simple. He wants to know that you care for him.”
“I do care for him,” Esther said earnestly. “That’s what’s making it so difficult for me. I don’t want to deceive him. I don’t want to hurt him.”
“Isn’t the best way to keep from deceiving and hurting him to grant him the thing he wants most?” Amelia asked. “He wants to court the lady he loves, and to know that she returns his affections. And you have the power to give him that.”
Esther closed her eyes. “You don’t think I’m being deceitful, Amelia?”
“I think you’re young, My Lady,” Amelia said gently. “I think your parents raised you to think of marriage as a contract. A bargain you would one day enter into. You’re not to be faulted for having that idea. If anything, you’re to be congratulated for freeing yourself from it.”
Esther nodded. “Perhaps you’re right.”
“You haven’t deceived the Duke,” Amelia said. “Your feelings for him are true. He wants and deserves your love, My Lady. And you deserve his.”
Esther sighed, feeling a great release of tension in her chest. “Thank you, Amelia,” she said. “Perhaps you’re right. You’re always so wise about matters of the heart.”
“One of these days, you’ll remember that,” Amelia said with a wry smile. “One of these days you’ll listen to me the first time I try to tell you something.”
“I will,” Esther agreed. “Every time I talk to you, I wish I had listened sooner.”
“Get into bed,” Amelia said. “You’ve had a big night, what with all your kissing and confessions of true love.”
Esther laughed. “You make it sound like more than it was,” she said. “He stole a kiss in the garden. That was really all.”
“No, that wasn’t all,” Amelia said. “You opened your heart for the first time, My Lady. It’s a very big day indeed.”
Esther nodded. The truth was that she felt as if she was walking on air. And now that Amelia had helped her find her way through the guilt of her less than honest start with Hugh, her heart was so light she thought a cloud might come and carry her away.
“He’s coming for dinner in a few nights, you know,” she said as she got into bed.
“Oh, I know,” Amelia said. “Your parents have alerted the entire staff. It’s to be quite the affair. Do you need a hot water bottle?”
“No, thank you,” Esther said. “I’m warm enough tonight.”
Amelia nodded. “Good night, then, My Lady,” she said. “I’m very happy for you that you’ve found love. I never gave up hope that you would.”
She extinguished the lantern on the wall and took her leave. Esther lay on her back staring up at the candlelight flickering on the ceiling and daydreaming.
Hugh’s hands in hers.
Hugh’s lips on hers.
Hugh, holding her in his arms as they danced, twirling her so skillfully that she felt as if her feet never even touched the ground.
Really, how could I help but fall in love with him?
