But only if he knew thetruth.
“Well, we shall see. Maybe that is what my future holds, maybe that will be my life adventure, I am not sosure.”
“Yes,” Ewan replied. “We shallsee.”
Eventually, Ewan forced himself to stand up from the table to put an end to their conversation for now. He hated to break the magic when they were having such a wonderful chat, but he was acutely aware that they had a journey to continue onwith.
“We must go, I have my business meeting, and you need to attend to yourfather.”
Iris instantly rearranged her features as Ewan said that. She remembered what this trip was supposed to be about; her father’s untimely death. She dragged up the feelings she had felt when her father was actually dying and her face immediately fell. It did not matter that she was not close to him, it was still very sad to lose the man who raisedher.
“Now, where is your home so I can give the driver youraddress?”
As Iris reeled off where Elizabeth lived, she suddenly recognized her mistake. There was no way that she could pass off being Daisy Jones if she was headed towards a grand building such as that. She had to think of an excuse andquickly.
“That is where my sister currently works anyway,” she continued rapidly, hoping that she could pull it off. “She has requested that I meet her there, I hope that is not too muchtrouble.”
“Not at all, anywhere you need to go. My business is near that area anyway.” Ewan gave Iris a caring smile. “And you take as long as you need. If there is anything I can do to help, you must let meknow.”
“Thank you, but you have already doneenough.”
Iris could not have Ewan helping her because she had told him a lie, but it was lovely of him to offer. His words touched her deeply as she imagined what it’d be like if she was telling the truth. She pictured him assisting her and her sister with their father’s funeral and falling even deeper in love with her as hedid.
Then her mind raced towards the kissing again, without her even meaning it to, and Iris could feel her face flame with embarrassment. She could not think about such things while sitting right in front of Ewan, it was bad enough that she thought such things when she wasalone!
“Shall we leave then?” Ewan interrupted her thoughts, bringing her right back to the presentmoment.
“Yes, we should,” Iris replied gratefully. “We still have far togo.”
“Are you sure you have eatenenough?”
Ewan seemed concerned as if he thought Iris might not eat again for a very long time. She supposed that maybe he truly did feel that way if he thought she was returning to the home of a lowbornfamily.
“I have eaten better than I have done so in a very long time,” Iris replied honestly. “Thank you, I am ready to leavenow.”
They left the dining hall and walked back through the reception area. Ewan thanked the owner of the home and waved goodbye to her. This time, Iris did not hide behind him, she stood proudly and thanked the lady too. She felt less and less like she had anything to be ashamed of. The judgement of others did not affect her in the way that it oncehad.
Iris felt a bounce in her step as she left the guest house behind Ewan because there was that much excitement balled up in her. The closer she got to Elizabeth, the happier she felt about it. It had been such a long time since she’d seen her, and now she would have the chance to spend some time with her. Even if there was no telling which way it would go, Iris feltpositive.
Something about this day felt wonderful and she hoped that would continue once she reached her sister’shome.
As her carriage pulled away from the guest house, Iris gave it the long, lingering look she had given the Oakley home, just for a different reason. That was because the house was her home, this was because Ewan had allowed her to see a piece of his true self within those walls. He had opened himself up to her and made her fall for him evendeeper.
She just wished that she could give him the same. It was a shame that she had to hold so much of herself back. Iris felt like it was a real shame that she could not share any of her own childhood stories with Ewan, nor could she discuss with him any troubles that she had faced. That was the reason she could not consider really marrying him, even if she was in love. She would never be able to keep the mask fixed in place forever. Eventually, she would slip up and everything wouldunravel.
It would be kinder for her to keep her distance now. It might hurt them both, but the pain would only be temporary. Eventually, they would be able to move on with most of their heartsintact.
Maybe. Iris had made no solid decision about what she intended to do next. Maybe if things with Elizabeth went well she would gain the courage, to tell the truth about everything. By this point anything waspossible.
It seemed hard to accept now that once upon a time, Iris led a very stable and boring life. She remained in her bedroom, hidden away from the rest of the world, and she was truly content with that. She might have remained that way forever had she not been forced to change... but if she hadn’t, then she would not have come on this wild adventure. She would not have experienced time with this wonderfulman.
Even if their time together hadn’t always been easy, she wouldn’t want to change it for the world. That would be the truth even if things did not turn out the way that she wanted them to. The memory of this love was worth all the heartache that was sure tofollow.
As the carriage bumped along the road, Iris felt her eyes fluttering shut. It seemed the lack of sleep that she’d had over the last few weeks was finally catching up with her, and she could take it no longer. Or maybe it was because she finally had a sense of peace within her, which was strange considering what she was about to do. Her head slumped forwards, her eyes blocked the world out, even the sounds fadedaway.
It was the most uncomfortable position ever, but Iris fell into the deepest, most dreamless sleep that she’d had in a very long time. It was the sort of rest that would allow her to wake up refreshed, if not a littlestiff.
