“Doyou want to be?”
“OfcourseIdo.”
Merit’sphone lit up with a text, and he typed a response before continuing. “I’venoticed thatKelliis a bit of a perfectionist.”
Parkerchuckled. “Youcould say that.Whichis crazy, because she’s perfect even when she’s not trying to be.”
Meritstudied him for long enough that it made him flinch.Thiswasn’t his boss studying him—this was theCEO, the co-founder, and the co-owner of the huge companyParkerworked for.Thiswas by far more intense than any timeAdam’sfocus was on him.Itmade him feel exposed, as ifMeritcould see anything about him that he wanted to.
“Haveyou ever noticed that you’re a bit of a perfectionist, too?”
Parkerrubbed his forehead, frowning.Hehadn’t ever thought that of himself.
“Parker, if there’s anythingI’velearned by falling in love withElise, it’s thatKellidoesn’t need you to be perfect.Nobodyneeds to be perfect.It’sonly ever about recognizing your shortcomings and working to overcome them.Youhave your own incredible strength of character.GrahamandIwouldn’t have brought you on this trip otherwise.Everyamazing personI’veever met has gotten there by continually working to become better.Neverbecause they’re working to become perfect, only that they’re working to be better today than they were yesterday.
“Sowork to be better.Makeit a habit to apologize sincerely when you’re wrong.Andlet her know how you feel about her already.”
Parkershook his head. “Idon’t know.”Allof that made sense logically.Andhe could see it working.Butwhat about the long term? “I’mjust… not good at being able to tell when things start to go wrong.”
“Thisex-fiancée of yours—from what you told me, you were blindsided when she gave you this list, right?”
“Verymuch so.”
“Okay.Wereyou blindsided when things went wrong withKelli?”
“Yeah.”
Hisanswer had come quickly, butMeritwas still looking at him like he was waiting for him to think it through, so he did.Thingshad been going well.Buthe’d had his own fears he’d been working through, and looking back, he could easily see when those things were impacting things withKelli, even before their disastrous conversation.
Andfrom what he knew aboutKelli’smom leaving and her dad’s new family, she had plenty of fears she was working through, too.Heknew all of that and knew it could be an issue.
Andthen he thought about the conversation in his room about her dad.Hehad looked at her face several times during that conversation and saw what it was doing to her.Yethe still kept talking, still kept saying things about her dad.
Hadhe even meant everything that he had said?Hadhe forgotten that she was much more important than any negative opinions he had of her dad?Orhad he simply been allowing his fears to take over, and subconsciously sabotaged everything with a single, terrible, hurtful conversation?Hewasn’t sure, and the weight of what he’d done hit him anew.
Heshook his head. “Iwasn’t blindsided.”
Meritnodded, and then he picked up his phone, touching several things while he spoke. “Grahamwanted in on this conversation.Andsince he’sGraham, he sent his contribution in the form of a slideshow.”
Parkerchuckled asMeritturned his phone toward him.Grahammust’ve had the slides set to a timer because each one switched to the next on its own.Thefirst slide was of the twelve of them who had come on the retreat—the same bobble-headed images from the slideshowGrahamhad presented on the first day—standing in front of the limos, holding their luggage, with sounds of cheering.
Mostof them had a bag and a suitcase, butParkerseemed to have the most luggage of them all.Hehad the bag and suitcase but also wore a huge backpack like the kind hikers take when they want to stay overnight somewhere and they have to pack in all of their bedding, shelter, clothing, food, and cooking supplies.Itwas big enough that it even rose higher than his head.
Thenit switched to the second slide, and a slow, instrumental song played throughMerit’sphone’s speakers as bobble-headedParkerand bobble-headedKellidanced, which wasn’t easy with their bodies that were so much smaller than their heads.Theluggage was gone, butParkerwas still wearing the giant backpack.
Thenext slide came with the sound of forks clinking on plates, and bobble-headedKelliwas smiling at bobble-headedParkeras they both served food at the soup kitchen.Thebackpack was still onParker’sback.
Asthe next slide came on the screen, the song thatMeritandGrahamhad sung to wake them upChristmasmorning—WeWishYouaMerryChristmas—played, as all seventeen of them sat around aChristmastree, including babyHopeinTessa’sarms.Parkerwas holding aChristmaspresent out toKelliand, of course, he was still wearing the backpack.
Thenext slide was split into two.Onthe left was an outline of the state ofColorado, with a bobble-headed cryingKelliin the middle of it; on the right wasSouthCarolinawith a bobble-headed cryingParker, still wearing the backpack.Hecouldn’t say he’d cried, but the image still captured how brokenhearted he felt.
Thenext slide was of a plane on a runway.AnanimatedParkerthrew off the backpack and then ran with his suitcase to the plane.Thenit switched to bobble-headedParkerand bobble-headedKellikissing, a love song playing in the background.
Thevisuals, fun and cartoony as they were, hit him hard.Butat the same time, they filled him with hope.
Meritsmiled, shaking his head, as he closed out of the slideshow. “Grahamis nothing if not theatrical in his slideshows.Ithink the point he got across without using a single word was that it’s easy to project the baggage from a past relationship onto the next,Parker.We’veall done it.Justremember thatKelliand your ex aren’t the same.Youaren’t even the same.Sodon’t let your past ruin something pretty great in your future.”
Parkerswallowed, lettingMerit’swords andGraham’spictures sink in. “Ican see whyZentCubeis so successful.You’repretty wise.”
